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1. [+557, -32] Imagine buying albums and fan merchandise and paying for his gifts only to be hit with wedding and pregnancy news ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ of course fans are pissed...
2. [+500, -14] He's already made enough money to live off of, he lucked out ㅋ
3. [+426, -24] The best solution seems for him to voluntarily leave the group
4. [+39, -5] People might think that fans are taking this too far but I understand where they're coming from. These idols are always telling their fans that they're the only people who matter and accept all their gifts and love... only to turn around with news of not only a wedding but a pre-marital pregnancy that's already seven months along? And not one line of apology in the announcement? I consider that a lack of consideration for his fans. It's true that fans shouldn't be too involved with these idols but they shouldn't be blamed when things go wrong like this too;;;
5. [+33, -4] Judging by how different the reactions are compared to Changmin and Kim Heechul... I don't think fans are simply pissed over the wedding and going as far as petitioning to kick him out of the group...
6. [+24, -1] Whether he gets married or not, what remains fact is that he negatively impacted EXO's image with his pre-marital pregnancy. It's going to be hard for the members and their fans to recover from that. Just look at the comments... non-fans are already attacking them over it...
7. [+19, -2] Scary... ㅋㅋ how they became the enemy in just one moment
8. [+18, -0] Not like he was that important of a member in the group anyway... or a good singer...
9. [+15, -4] Nevermind the wedding, an idol with a pre-marital pregnancy is just too shocking.
10. [+13, -1] Looks like he's going to have to leave ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ he's f*cked ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ all his fans have left
I don't agree with the Knetz obviously but the entire industry and Kpop model is built/designed around perpetrating that romantic fantasy, so there needs to be a lot of changes before we start seeing a shift in fan reaction to stuff like this.
I honestly think if it were just dating news, fans wouldn't push for him to leave the group. The marriage coupled with pregnancy probably pissed them off more.
I'm not Korean but based on my assessment of the culture over the years it's due to a combination of things.
The first being Korea's conservative nature and the expectation of a certain "order and tradition" to things. I.e. a "by appearances" shotgun wedding to cover an again "by appearances" unplanned or concealed pregnancy is not the expected order. It violates concepts of propriety and there's a shameful aspect to it under a conservative interpretation.
Second, and tied into the first is the violation of familial loyalty. I admittedly have a very light and superficial understanding (I'll probably butcher it lol) but the gist is that Confucian ideals stress familial loyalty. And family is used as a broad hierarchical concept. It's not just your immediate family but a successive progression outward from your father and mother to society at large. There's an expectation of obedience, loyalty and sacrifice to each successive layer as part of the harmony of their culture philosophy. You aren't supposed to go out and indulge your perceived selfish desires at the expense of these hierarchical groups. In this context.... EXO and by extension the fanbase could be considered a heirachical family grouping with the inherent loyalties expected. It seems not until later in the groups life cycle, when one is in the 30s, does a sort of transition take place where the more rigid idol group loyalty subsides.
Third being, obviously, the built in fantasy aspect of kpop. Idols are designed as romantic fantasy vehicles.
All this combined.... And you get backlashes of this sort.
Anyway. That's my observations. Although no promise I'm not off the mark lol.
Chen was never really the type to treat his fans as his girlfriends. He even said several times that EXO-Ls are his family. And he was ignored by a good part of the fandom during many years. Mostly by K-fans because he isn’t the typical visual but also by some international fans who were speaking about him only to drag about EXO vocals. And now they are everywhere out there to complain on the Internet because they can’t control his life anymore.
I am a Chen stan and also a Kyungsoo stan so I know what I am talking about.
He was right to not apologize because otherwise things are never going to change and just like I saw a difference about idol dating after Hyuna and Dawn dating scandal, I hope that his decision is going to help more idols who want to get married in the future.
I agree about the fact that the industry is selling this idea that idols are the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend but honestly the fact that grown-up adults still fall for it to the point of asking for his removal is baffling.
Despite being a kpop fan for almost five years now, things like this still come as a culture shock (celebrity weddings are celebrated and sometimes mvs/songs about them are released too) but I understand with how Kpop is presented, fans would be pissed.
Idols are romanticized as objects to be purchased and owned. Luckily it seems like chenbar is still supportive of him and they’re the bulk of album purchases, so I don’t think a suju situation will repeat itself.
When i thought all EXO-L where actually being mature a band of wild crazies appeared. It' been awhile since we seen some wild crazy EXO-L. And they wonder why dating and what not ends up getting hidden for awhile. You wouldn't share things if you know people viewed you as property rather then a person. It's amazing how some people can't grasp that idols have emotions, wants and needs.
As for the pre-martital accident-well I bet you wouldn't have those if you allowed marriage. But you know still accidents happen. Birds and bees, when two people are attracted to each others chances are some whoo hoo is going to happen,
You take responsibility over the person that you love,
but I'm sad that you're not taking responsibility over the person who loves you.
I regret trying to grab onto what I should've let go.
EXO is a group that will forever be my youth, but because of Jongdae, this image is gone.
Were we only a business relationship?.. You didn't make a promise to us forever?
I thought that if we had to set priorities, we should've followed those priorities and made so we understand each other, but right now, you actions are just showing that fans and you were just a business. That's why I'm so disappointed and my heart hurts even more Jongdae-yah.
You were the "trustful Chen" and now your labels changed to "premarital pregnancy" and "kid's dad" etc. my heart just hurts so much, it just hurts.
The road that we still have to walk together is still long, I don't want us to stop now, and you either. Did you want to walk on the way that the fans paved for you? You're too selfish Jongdae-yah. I knew you didn't want to do SNS. And you probably don't look at the comments on Youtube either. So there's not much ways we can communicate but I still tried to write something... The letter that you threw away. I've been crying for so many hours being confused, I was pitying myself.
I loved you, but I think that I will love you in the future too. That's why Jongdae-yah just say "I'm sorry" once. I think this should be taking each other into consideration.
I received an alarm and I was so happy thinking that it could've been the news of your solo concert but my hands started to tremble and my tears started to fall out as I dropped my phone. You probably didn't know how I felt right?
Happy (t/n: no pronoun). Still be happy.
Knetz reactions:
1. [+347, -3]
I cried when I read the part of her receiving an alarm from him being happy wishing it was his solo concert
2. [+223, -3]
The last "be happy" was so bitter sweet... Seriously no matter how much of a controversy you create and how much of a reality check they get, no matter how many days or how many years it's been, they'll still wish happiness over the person they like
3. [+184, -4]
It really feels like a post that hits straight to her feelings... I feel horrible... EXO-Ls are probably having it worse.. Please be strong..
4. [+144, -72]
Anyone would think that this was written by an ex-girlfriend
5. [+105, -8]
Those pseudo relationship feelings are seriously confusing..
Also, apparently people are discussing whether EXO should've just remained EXO-K
[enter-talk] WOULDN'T EXO-K ALONE BE F*CKING PERFECT?
Kai, Suho, Chanyeol. Baekhyun, D.O, Sehun
They're all stan attractors and gather all the fans, and they're all CLEAN
6 people is more than enough and it's just right
1. [+341, -10]
They should've just debuted that way, the Chinese pigeons all flew away, and Chen is involved in premarital pregnangy and Xiumin is playing with Choi Sujin in front of the fans, EXO-M are just f*cked
2. [+324, -14]
They'll just chew on everyone, they'll forever be the top if it was only those 6
3. [+238, -6]
This is just right, let's just re-sign with EXO-K
4. [+179, -1]
At this point, you have to praise Sooman's discerning eyes for separating EXO-K at the beginning... We should just change the name to EXO-K now and promote them like that. They already have 2 main vocals, and they have sub-vocals, a leader, a visual member, a main dancer, main rapper, they have everything, what are we worried about?
5. [+133, -4]
D.O and Baekhyun can take care of the singing, so we're already set. Kai will do the dancing, so there's no issue, Sehun and Chanyeol will rap and the leader will be Suho, this is perfect.
I wish people would grow the f**k up. Unless he has harmed another person or animal, they should stop crying like 5 year olds and let him live his life while entertaining the people who like him regardless.
Stop whining and start making a name for yourselves instead of hating on someone who has already done something with his life.
So much negativity, so much whining, instead of making the world a better place.
Get the f**k over it!
It does seem like the pregnancy is the major divider here and not the relationship or even the marriage which I can only work out that it's from fear that Chen just won't be around as much being as he's now a father which does bring a possibility that he's around less.
We know very little of how people react to top idol pregnancies because it just doesn't happen, most are involving idols out of the spotlight like Soyul and Moon Heejun.
This is the second one I can think of with Sunye from Wonder Girls being the first and that was almost 8 years ago so as far as reaction it doesn't give us much to base on.
1. [+557, -32] Imagine buying albums and fan merchandise and paying for his gifts only to be hit with wedding and pregnancy news ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ of course fans are pissed...
Lol. I don't know why, but this was super funny to me in a sad way. I'm with the poster above who said you got what you paid for -- the merchandise. Yeah, I get the concept of stanning and the whole idol-product culture and fantasy -- but that's not reality. It's not. And saying "that's just how things are" and "the company and idol are partly to blame for selling--" ha, miss me with that. It's not reality, period, and I'm not gonna coddle k-netz or fans in general who take this position. At the end of the day, they don't own Chen, the person, period. His life to live. Can't knock the reaction because this didn't happen in a vacuum (I can acknowledge that), but I can certainly look down on it -- and I do.
4. [+39, -5] People might think that fans are taking this too far but I understand where they're coming from. These idols are always telling their fans that they're the only people who matter and accept all their gifts and love... only to turn around with news of not only a wedding but a pre-marital pregnancy that's already seven months along? And not one line of apology in the announcement? I consider that a lack of consideration for his fans. It's true that fans shouldn't be too involved with these idols but they shouldn't be blamed when things go wrong like this too;;;
And part of what bothers me about this whole thing, in addition to the fact that it promotes unhealthy attachments and unreal expectations, is the false moral supremacy they're trying to attach to it. If Chen does apologize, I sincerely hope it smacks of "Sorry you feel this way." Sigh. I try to give an inch on these things -- different culture, different perspective -- but I'm just gonna be honest... Just like idols "know what they're getting into," so do fans. They do. Do you know what I do when I get overly invested in something to the point of being ludicrous? When I realize it, I take a step back -- especially because I have people around me who won't coddle my delusions. Yeah, K-Pop companies and idols sell a fantasy, and fans go into it knowing it's a fantasy. If we're calling out cultural evils of the industry, also call out the cultural evils of fandoms that do, in fact, coddle their own delusions so they can feel justified in directing hate to anyone who stirs their ire.
And this is why I was side-eyeing people who were so thirsty for the dating scandal to come out. A whole lot of "Fans" are not mature enough for this stuff yet, clearly. This is so sad to see happen again to yet another idol.
I'm not Korean but based on my assessment of the culture over the years it's due to a combination of things.
The first being Korea's conservative nature and the expectation of a certain "order and tradition" to things. I.e. a "by appearances" shotgun wedding to cover an again "by appearances" unplanned or concealed pregnancy is not the expected order. It violates concepts of propriety and there's a shameful aspect to it under a conservative interpretation.
Second, and tied into the first is the violation of familial loyalty. I admittedly have a very light and superficial understanding (I'll probably butcher it lol) but the gist is that Confucian ideals stress familial loyalty. And family is used as a broad hierarchical concept. It's not just your immediate family but a successive progression outward from your father and mother to society at large. There's an expectation of obedience, loyalty and sacrifice to each successive layer as part of the harmony of their culture philosophy. You aren't supposed to go out and indulge your perceived selfish desires at the expense of these hierarchical groups. In this context.... EXO and by extension the fanbase could be considered a heirachical family grouping with the inherent loyalties expected. It seems not until later in the groups life cycle, when one is in the 30s, does a sort of transition take place where the more rigid idol group loyalty subsides.
Third being, obviously, the built in fantasy aspect of kpop. Idols are designed as romantic fantasy vehicles.
All this combined.... And you get backlashes of this sort.
Anyway. That's my observations. Although no promise I'm not off the mark lol.
It is pretty looked down upon for pre-marital pregnancies because:
#1 The parents haven't really blessed the situations yet. Marriage is basically them blessing their right to have children.
#2 There is no guarantee that the male would stay after the pregnancy, and a woman by herself, without male authority looks rude to the family.
I understand it looks bad, but I don't think that he should be removed for that specific reason. I'm not normally one to say someone isn't a real fan, but if they were, they would be supporting Chen anyway for getting married and starting a happy family. I would understand him leaving so he can enlist and be there for his family, but just trying to get him to leave, because he gave EXO a 'bad image' isn't really an excuse. There have been way worse situations in other groups, and they haven't been petitioned out. That confuses me.
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