The video I posted records PassCode's first one-man live. The following interview extract tells about the circumstances that surrounded this event and how it impacted the group.
──It basically didn’t fit you at all. (laughs)
Takashima It was really tiresome.
Minami It became a 4 person setup, and before our first live performance we were practicing every day, even going so far as living together. We’d stay the night at the office, dancing from morning until evening.
Takashima But that living together and practicing the whole day, it was tough but it was also good. Like, “Idol’s actually pretty good, isn’t it?” Well, but I guess after that practice was also hard, so I still thought I should quit. (laughs)
Minami It’s gonna be a terrible conversation when fans read this you guys...(laughs)
Like a house without supports
──Minami, did you notice that the 2 girls thought they wanted to quit?
Minami Nope, the reality is that at the time we weren’t that close. I didn’t really know what they were thinking about. But they somehow conveyed that they wanted to quit.
Takashima We didn’t really have that deep of conversations or anything.
Imada There was a bit of a wall during the time with ex-members and new members.
Minami There wasn’t a feeling of wanting to hang out together on the surface. (laughs)
── There wasn’t the feeling of asking them, “Are you thinking you want to quit?” or anything?
Minami I was scared so I couldn’t ask! (laughs) Those two were older than me, the older girls. There wasn’t the feeling then like there is now where I can ask them about anything.
Imada So you perservered, right?
Minami It became so that I didn’t know what I should do...I felt like if they quit and the group broke up, there was nothing I could do about it.
──After the coming of the new system, it was a new start, but the period of instability for the group was continuing, wasn’t it?
Minami Yeah, it totally was. It takes a lot of time for a clear bond to be born among group members. Anyway, if you asked around to the members, it looked like it was over. I thought PassCode would end, and that I couldn’t do anything. There was absolutely no contact with [Yu-ri] Kurohara. There especially was the feeling that no one had a good relationship with each other. I thought the diagram of PassCode at that time was like 1 pair of people and another pair of people.
Imada It felt like a house without supports. A really loose feeling.
The things we had been doing were wrong
──In the middle of that long-running situation, songs were being made at a high pace, weren’t they?
Imada That was also really rough because we had to make up the whole pretense!
Minami Only the members thought about the appearance of the songs on the first album “ALL IS VANITY”. So we also had to create the appearance of the songs, and memorize them, and because I had no idea what the [other] members were thinking about, I got really irritated. But because I couldn’t put voice to that [lit. “Couldn’t do the words to my mouth”] everyone’s attitude worsened, and the atmosphere became heated.
Takashima I wanted to go home.
──If this were a normal group, then having new songs would be a happy occasion, but it wasn’t an atmosphere you could be joyous in, was it?
Imada Time was short and no one was really going along with it...
──”When will peace and tranquility visit this group?” was the worry. (laughs)
Imada The heated [feelings] continued. It was that way until about when our One-Man [solo concert] was.
Minami Yeah. After our One-Man was over, everyone’s feelings changed a lot.
Imada I didn’t think that many Hackers (name for fans of PassCode) would come [to see us]. We got up on stage and were immediately surprised.
Minami As soon as the curtain was opened, I was deeply moved.
Takashima Like, “Wow, this many people came to support us?”
Imada Until that point there was never the feeling that live performances were fun. I hated screaming. But we had to say that live shows were fun while we were there, didn’t we? I also hated that feeling of lying.
──That whole time sounds pretty depressing.
Imada I found myself thinking, ”Is this what concerts feel like?” But at the One-Man we saw the hall become an amazing spectacle. It was the first time we were able to have a feeling like, “Wouldn’t you say this is fun?!” It’s like the things we had been doing were wrong.
Takashima I also thought at the time that I wanted PassCode to continue.