Official ✯ ✵ Mental Health Support✯ ✵ (29 Viewers)

[snsd2beg]

I gotta stop making myself cry like this
I'm so fucking sick and angry
I can't even write it out on here bc it's disgusting
Why did you do this to me?

 

[dark_tranquility]

Why glitch when I don't want it to

 

[dark_tranquility]

my headspace isn't even me doing it

 

[princesita]

Spoiler: oversharing. i needed to get this rant out

the older i get, i remember how toxic my ex was. mind you, i was 14, my ex was 17 at the time. that isn't the hugest age gap or whatever. but i was so mentally and emotionally unprepared for a relationship like that. this person cheated on me (i took them back like an idiot), ghosted me all of the time, and just was emotionally distant. i was so young and so inexperienced at the time, i just internalized it as my fault and it led to codependency on my part and low self esteem. i felt the need to give them more affection and attention so they'd like me better, which never ever worked. i just wish i could go back and give myself a hug and tell myself to avoid that person. they were a fun friend, but that relationship completely rewired my brain in a way that just shouldn't have happened when i was literally in the 8th grade. now i feel like i just need to people please to get praise and attention, and i still to this day can't fully comprehend anyone genuinely liking me beyond just how i appear. I don't really even know how to feel about it thinking about it now. sure, i can be upset, and i am. but i wasn't perfect either. i was childish and naive, i just let this person walk all over me even when i knew deep down that they didn't like me nearly as much as i liked them. maybe that's why i was so insecure in the relationship. i don't want to be someone who can't move on and not be angry at this person anymore. no matter how old i get, i still do just get upset. they never even apologized, i think that's why i get upset about it when i remember back then.

 

[dark_tranquility]

Spoiler: oversharing. i needed to get this rant out

the older i get, i remember how toxic my ex was. mind you, i was 14, my ex was 17 at the time. that isn't the hugest age gap or whatever. but i was so mentally and emotionally unprepared for a relationship like that. this person cheated on me (i took them back like an idiot), ghosted me all of the time, and just was emotionally distant. i was so young and so inexperienced at the time, i just internalized it as my fault and it led to codependency on my part and low self esteem. i felt the need to give them more affection and attention so they'd like me better, which never ever worked. i just wish i could go back and give myself a hug and tell myself to avoid that person. they were a fun friend, but that relationship completely rewired my brain in a way that just shouldn't have happened when i was literally in the 8th grade. now i feel like i just need to people please to get praise and attention, and i still to this day can't fully comprehend anyone genuinely liking me beyond just how i appear. I don't really even know how to feel about it thinking about it now. sure, i can be upset, and i am. but i wasn't perfect either. i was childish and naive, i just let this person walk all over me even when i knew deep down that they didn't like me nearly as much as i liked them. maybe that's why i was so insecure in the relationship. i don't want to be someone who can't move on and not be angry at this person anymore. no matter how old i get, i still do just get upset. they never even apologized, i think that's why i get upset about it when i remember back then.

I am sorry you had to go through that
I've been there as well
it is heart wrenching

 

[dark_tranquility]

It switches on and off annoying

 

[princesita]

long day again and even when i'm tired i can't sleep until 5 or 6am. i want to sleep good. i want to eat good. i want to wake up and feel better than i usualy do. something to look forward to and be excited about.

 

[dark_tranquility]

long day again and even when i'm tired i can't sleep until 5 or 6am. i want to sleep good. i want to eat good. i want to wake up and feel better than i usualy do. something to look forward to and be excited about.

all the best in your journey

 

[princesita]

all the best in your journey

thank uu

 

[dark_tranquility]

thank uu

ANYTIME

 

[dark_tranquility]

I wish I wasn't how I was mentally and emotionally

 

[dark_tranquility]

stupid stupid stupid

 

[dark_tranquility]

400 + 500 good

gaming helps me relax

 

[Villains]

i feel like the sadness is coming back in some ways. i kind of feel like i did last year and i'm scared because i don't want to go back.

 

[RockyGoose]

I think I have that problem where I keep dwelling on the past.
Thinking about past mistakes, past sins, past regrets etc...
I know that I probably should be thinking about the future (probably also the "now")

 

[RockyGoose]

Well... one thing I regret is me maybe not doing my best in college and being perhaps too lazy.
I remember feeling low self-esteem or feeling not smart enough (perhaps a consequence for being lazy)
I did also suffer from something that perhaps was panic attacks back then (but I think that was more because I had been grieving)

But college life was perhaps also a bit stressful.

 

[dark_tranquility]

nothing changes it either gets worse or more worse

 

[sooya_]

Bad thing: I'm just gonna say I feel betrayed alot and sad sometimes. I feel something is wrong with me and does that make me a pick me?(idk it came to my mind first)
Good thing: Not all of my YouTube videos flop. (only thing I could think of good)

 

[dark_tranquility]

Too much anxiousness is never good

 

[snsd2beg]

Bad thing: I'm just gonna say I feel betrayed alot and sad sometimes. I feel something is wrong with me and does that make me a pick me?(idk it came to my mind first)
Good thing: Not all of my YouTube videos flop. (only thing I could think of good)

I don't think that makes you a pick me