Did your parents have an intentional parenting style? (1 Viewer)

[centen]

I had to Google what "concerted cultivation" was after stumbling across a discussion on if it helps raise successful kids, hence the question.

 

[centen]

For me personally, maybe my parents had thoughts that they should do or not do specific things, but I'm 100% sure they did not follow anything more intentional than "oops, there is another human now that we're legally required to keep alive."

 

[athenaaa]

“Let’s not fuck up like generations before us”

 

[Ahsoka]

Let’s make sure they don’t die was theirs I think

 

[centen]

“Let’s not fuck up like generations before us”

My parents told me that was the goal, but tbh, I think they just fucked up in a different way.

 

[centen]

Let’s make sure they don’t die was theirs I think

Mission accomplished!!

 

[athenaaa]

@centen also “go ask your mom” was a common parenting strategy

 

[ChiaraStar169]

taking my internet away if bad grades was one I remember. I'm sure there were others, like "go ask Mom/Dad", but idk lol

 

[The_LastRomeo]

Idk if raising me one way and then going soft on other kids wasn't intentional or not

 

[centen]

Idk if raising me one way and then going soft on other kids wasn't intentional or not

The real question: would they SAY it was?

 

[Selfmate]

not my parents but an interesting poem nevertheless

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.

 

[Lexie]

My parents were very loving, patient and soft. They never hit us, I can’t even recall them ever raising their voices at me or my siblings. As long as we are not doing drug or hurting anyone, they allowed us to do whatever.

 

[Tickita]

Make them smart and give them Jesus. Shelter the girls, let the boys out.

 

[Ahsoka]

Mission accomplished!!

Don’t jinx it

 

[centen]

not my parents but an interesting poem nevertheless

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.

That's the plan!!

 

[Selfmate]

That's the plan!!

interesting - again if such topic is uncomfortable for you feel free to not answer and tell selfie to shove murder dolls where the sun don't shine but is going child free a certainty at this stage my friend or just haven't met the right person?

 

[centen]

interesting - again if such topic is uncomfortable for you feel free to not answer and tell selfie to shove murder dolls where the sun don't shine but is going child free a certainty at this stage my friend or just haven't met the right person?

Nah, you're fine! (Note: special exception for selfie, because I do hate it when people treat me like I'm broken for not having children, and I know selfie doesn't mean it that way.)

I have never felt the desire. It'd be like asking "when did you decide you didn't want a pet snake;" it wasn't something that I ever had a yearning for in the first place, but ultimately decided against.

 

[Selfmate]

Nah, you're fine! (Note: special exception for selfie, because I do hate it when people treat me like I'm broken for not having children, and I know selfie doesn't mean it that way.)

I have never felt the desire. It'd be like asking "when did you decide you didn't want a pet snake;" it wasn't something that I ever had a yearning for in the first place, but ultimately decided against.

I totally understand where you are coming from - even though I have children myself I can respect if others don't want to
everyone is free to do whatever they want children or otherwise and nobody should judge others choices even if personally it wouldn't be something that they would do
of course you aren't broken (you're just tasteless and on death's door but not broken!!!)

 

[The_LastRomeo]

The real question: would they SAY it was?

Considering my mm's excuse was "they grew", maybe that's a yes lol

 

[dark_tranquility]

My father was in the navy, so he had a disciplined and strict way of raising my brother and I