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TW: Death, Suicide, Depression, Grief
My dad works as a crime investigator, so I already knew something happened this morning before I even left for school. But it didn't really feel real at all yet. I had no idea who the student actually was until I got to my 1st hour class and the teacher told everyone what happened. I am not a very tearful person but it was very hard to watch as the teacher cried reading the news.
I didn’t know him super well or anything since he's a grade above me, I’ve just seen him around the hallways between classes and recognized his face. But even though we weren't close, walking through the school today just feels completely different. The whole atmosphere is just super heavy and it’s honestly hitting me a lot harder than I expected it to.
As someone who deals with my own struggles with depression and bad thoughts pretty much daily, it’s just a really weird, surreal experience when something like this happens right next to you. It kind of makes everything you're dealing with internally feel way more intense and up close. I realized how short our lives are, and while his was cut short it has made me question everything around me. Despite everything, I am still very empathetic, and it makes me so sad to see some of the guys he was best friends with being upset. I'm also honestly pretty mad at the people who are already making jokes about the situation.
I just really felt the need to get this off my chest and share it here. I’m not religious at all, but I’m still hoping and praying for him in my own way, and hoping his family is okay. If anyone else is dealing with heavy stuff today, you're not alone and please please please talk to someone. It breaks my heart when things such as this happen. Any good vibes or support in the replies would mean a lot right now.
My dad works as a crime investigator, so I already knew something happened this morning before I even left for school. But it didn't really feel real at all yet. I had no idea who the student actually was until I got to my 1st hour class and the teacher told everyone what happened. I am not a very tearful person but it was very hard to watch as the teacher cried reading the news.
I didn’t know him super well or anything since he's a grade above me, I’ve just seen him around the hallways between classes and recognized his face. But even though we weren't close, walking through the school today just feels completely different. The whole atmosphere is just super heavy and it’s honestly hitting me a lot harder than I expected it to.
As someone who deals with my own struggles with depression and bad thoughts pretty much daily, it’s just a really weird, surreal experience when something like this happens right next to you. It kind of makes everything you're dealing with internally feel way more intense and up close. I realized how short our lives are, and while his was cut short it has made me question everything around me. Despite everything, I am still very empathetic, and it makes me so sad to see some of the guys he was best friends with being upset. I'm also honestly pretty mad at the people who are already making jokes about the situation.
I just really felt the need to get this off my chest and share it here. I’m not religious at all, but I’m still hoping and praying for him in my own way, and hoping his family is okay. If anyone else is dealing with heavy stuff today, you're not alone and please please please talk to someone. It breaks my heart when things such as this happen. Any good vibes or support in the replies would mean a lot right now.
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