woah I understand you have some mental health issues so please take some time for yourself...
I think you're in the US but please seek some help
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
SANA!!!
reminds me of the episode in the simpsons where there was car convention or something and there was a "hot" girl showing off the cars and every dude who walked past said
"do you come with the car"
not a non-meat eater but like other's have said above
try having meat free days like once a week or something and ease into it slowly
if you try go completely met free your likely to relapse and get withdrawal symptoms as I've seen from friends
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