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I sort of given up on the idea of getting better and being more positive about it and I don't do hobbies anymore much, because my drive to do them is gone. I will just live with it, since I can't live without it.

Everyday I am alive and feel this way is torture. But I will and try to make, sense of things too.

Congrats on making moderator. Was going to say it sooner. But I've been feeling miserable lately and avoiding people as usual.

Thanks Daeun. I know we haven't talked for ages. But I appreciate your support nonetheless.

That's just it. I don't feel safe and they feel very real to me. Like I am too far gone. And schitzophrienia is different for everyone. Some deal with it, some don't Like me. Can't deal with this at all.

I am starting to hear voices and see visions everyday now, when it used to be once every few days. Also my brain is so distorted as is my thinking, that It is always "raining" in my head and I am in a constant dream state. I am starting to believe what the family in my head tells me and I...

I am going to sleep again. I will see your post when I wake up. Good night. Of Neo Japonism

No school, no job. Just living on a pension atm. Disability pension to be precise.

This song deeply arouses my sub conscious and everything within it. It's so creepy but also kind of beautiful. Love my clowns and love my American horrorcore rap <3 Vera lee haunting me, here with me, Vera Lee watching me carefully. Sounds a lot like those people in my head, is why I love...

Let's get excited together woo!

I won't as long as I am deeply influenced by what's in my head. It's hard to see each day out when all you, want is for your mind to be silent.

That is true. But I forgot to mention besides my lack of excitement on traveling abroad. My father forbids me to travel due to, as he says if I have a breakdown overseas I am stuffed. So yeah not going to disobey either my father.

Yep. I am the life of the party when it comes to adventure and travel lol

I can be the cutie on the left while you are on the right. Hehe thanks. This made my night/day.

Your choice of emotes are splendid. So cute.

I like it. I cannot wait for this. I have a feeling it's going to be totally an awesome song.

I sort out how to survive a funeral by make them suffer as inspiration. An Australian symphonic deathcore band. That and my current mood and ill thoughts. Thanks, your compliment makes my world that much brighter.

Don't feel the need to visit. I don't have the travel bug like my gran, brother and dad do. Quite the opposite. I am fine with being where I am atm.

To spot a thief in the night. I have a bright and dark way of thinking Chasing ghosts in my nightmares The most vibrant of desires To aim higher is the plan But the crown is heavy My levy knows no limitations Fragmentation of my medicine That makes me ill of will And fight my thoughts on rewind...