a mess has erupted today (1 Viewer)

[multifanboy]

i am absolutely floored.

so as many of you know, i'm trans. my legal name is aaron but my birth name is something else. i've had my name changed on everything or so i thought.

scene: orientation

i went up to get my textbooks and this girl straight off the bat deadnames me and i'm internally like "what the shit???" but i say something along the lines of "my legal name is aaron and it was changed awhile ago that name should not be on file".

so she goes "oOoHH do you pReFeR aaRon",,, yes. it's on my schedule. and its also my legal name. she then said she can't take my deadname out of the system so i see her type in my deadname and i almost vomit.

i marched my ass right down to the councelor and she told me to go to the registering lady. so i did and the two of us when to talk to pReFeR girl and she was like yep! its all fine i put it in as the prefered name!" i just about lost it but i asked "so my other name is out of there right?" and they both said no.

then register lady told me to walk with her and she said that "we don't know how to change the name check back in 3 weeks"

at this point i'm shocked i havent had a meltdown so i go call my mom and tell her what happened.

then we were both floored.

i'm still trying to rationalize that all this happened. i really don't want my deadname to get out since it's been pretty much forgotten by everyone. it's so frustrationg to go through all the work of transitioning and changing things just to have stuff like this happen. it makes you think "i've gone through so much to get here, will anyone ever truly see me as who i am?". anyways i'm pissed, what a great start to the school year!

 

[maruberry]

This is such a mess! I feel bad for you, you shouldn't have to go through this.

Hopefully it's just that those idiots are uneducated and don't really understand what's up and aren't doing this out of some misguided attempt at something.

 

[honeyfornomoney]

Daaamn, they better fix it asap

 

[dokyeomon]

dealing with school/college counselors is just about always a pain in the ass,try not to stress too much about it,it will for sure get resolved

 

[Bopper]

Whose backside do I have to go kick?

 

[Darkyoda47]

I'm so sorry you have to go through this :(
"we don't know how to change the name check back in 3 weeks" THREE WEEKS?? Time for a few people to get fired

 

[Jungkook]

People can be so fucking rude


I'm sorry you had to go through that bullshit op

 

[DrowningFishy]

You realize how hard it is to deal with people with differnt names then the one given at birth. It's not solely because you're trans it happens to a lot of other people as well; especially immigrants who simplify their name. One of my clients birth name is 12 letter long african name but LEGALLY he goes by Okey, but unfortunately because of certain complications somewere along the way we cannot change his name to Okey like it should be. We put his badge as Okey like his license but in our system he is not. Makes sense? No? I'm right here with you I don't get it either. Legally his name is one thing but his birth name keeps sticking with him.

Just because you changed your name doesn't mean your first name disappears. But a tip when applying to new places make a note that the name on yoru birth certificate is not your legal binding name. Does make things a tad big easier unless you have a moron puttin gyou in.

 

[multifanboy]

This is such a mess! I feel bad for you, you shouldn't have to go through this.

Hopefully it's just that those idiots are uneducated and don't really understand what's up and aren't doing this out of some misguided attempt at something.

yeah i think it's just a honest mistake but i wish they would have tried to change it before now, i went to the same school last year. they had plenty of time.

 

[multifanboy]

You realize how hard it is to deal with people with differnt names then the one given at birth. It's not solely because you're trans it happens to a lot of other people as well; especially immigrants who simplify their name. One of my clients birth name is 12 letter long african name but LEGALLY he goes by Okey, but unfortunately because of certain complications somewere along the way we cannot change his name to Okey like it should be. We put his badge as Okey like his license but in our system he is not. Makes sense? No? I'm right here with you I don't get it either. Legally his name is one thing but his birth name keeps sticking with him.

Just because you changed your name doesn't mean your first name disappears. But a tip when applying to new places make a note that the name on yoru birth certificate is not your legal binding name. Does make things a tad big easier unless you have a moron puttin gyou in.

my birth certificate has aaron on it. i didn't get mad at anyone there because they're just doing their job. i would never be an asshole about things like that because i know it's not something they deal with all the time. i am not the type of person to blow up on anyone. logically there should be no reason my old name is on anything and as soon as i can i'm going to get it sealed so it cannot be associated with me at all.

 

[DrowningFishy]

my birth certificate has aaron on it. i didn't get mad at anyone there because they're just doing their job. i would never be an asshole about things like that because i know it's not something they deal with all the time. i am not the type of person to blow up on anyone. logically there should be no reason my old name is on anything and as soon as i can i'm going to get it sealed so it cannot be associated with me at all.

If that is the case then someone seriously needs to look into where the name leaked in. If your birth certifricate says Aaron then everyting else should say it since that is where everyone is looking for your name. Unless it's your past school records that caused the issue and a case of someone not double checking. I am not saying you're getting mad, I am just simply saying this annoying problem happens more then it should. You think once you changed your name for what ever reason that would be the end to yoru old name.

 

[kuro]

I hope they get it fixed soon, I'm sorry you have to go through this, it must be awful.

 

[multifanboy]

If that is the case then someone seriously needs to look into where the name leaked in. If your birth certifricate says Aaron then everyting else should say it since that is where everyone is looking for your name. Unless it's your past school records that caused the issue and a case of someone not double checking. I am not saying you're getting mad, I am just simply saying this annoying problem happens more then it should. You think once you changed your name for what ever reason that would be the end to yoru old name.

i'm guessing that somehow it transfered from my old school, yeah. also technically i'll have to name my old name as a "past name" on paperwork unless i seal it, making it totally irrelevant.

 

[yeji]

hope this will be fixed. it‘s not ok how that girl acted too