Genuine / Authentic people (1 Viewer)

[SHlNEE]

i consider myself a genuine authentic person
but how can we be sure we are?
what if you think you being genuine and authentic with someone but then you find out they experience you as a person who maybe comes across as overwhelming and/or overbearing even though you think all you doing is being genuine and yourself?
​

 

[mysteric]

I feel like I’m generally a genuine person, but I do realize that I am a hypocrite at times—then again, you wouldn’t be a functioning person in society if you had this naive sense of genuinely all the time
I believe it’s a matter of perspective tbh
Most people irl are fine with me, I’ve had a couple who thought that me being nice was a sign of my fakeness, whatever. I can’t control what others think of me if they’re set on it, so I may as well continue being myself, even if it comes off the wrong wag

 

[brekker]

I like what @mysteric is saying and it rings a bell. You can´t control with people. You can´t control their opinions of you. After all, we all have our right to have our own opinion and you know what they say opinions are like ass holes, everyone has one.
I sometimes dive into reading those philosophical books a la Paolo Coelho and I remember something I really enjoyed and I apply in daily life.
"Know who you are and accept it. People might like you - cool. People might dislike you - also cool." but know who YOU ARE and work with it. You might be overbearing for someone while someone else might even consider you distant. But whose right is it to decide that? And do other people decide who you are? Look at that example! We can´t base our own opinions on others, we base them on ourselves.
If people are fake .... are they so insecure to allow others to get to know them? It´s sad, but mostly for them. You are missing out. The world is a shitty, d ark place and when you are inclined to melancholy and depression, good luck having fun .... don´t miss out on light just because you are too afraid to tell the world who you are. there are people who like you.

and yeah we are all hypocrites sometimes. aren´t we allowed to not see the world in black and white? pfff people.

 

[NASA]

In each stage of my life I always think i'm being my most genuine self including now but often times when I look back to certain stages of my life I sort of realise how much I was hiding a part of myself or changing myself to fit in even though I was certain at the time that that was just who I was. Even though I feel like i'm at my most genuine now I still can't trust that i'll still feel that way come the next year and I look back on myself now. Maybe I always have been genuine this entire time and i've just changed as i've gotten older or maybe I really have been changing myself to fit in and possibly still do now, or maybe you can hide certain parts of yourself from others but still be a genuine person because different people just bring out a different side of you and we don't all just have one personality we can stick to and instead have lots of different personalities for different situations and people.

All in all I think as long as you believe you're being the best and most genuine you it doesn't really matter what you actually are in the long run since either you're doing absolutely fine or you're doing the absolute worst and you'll fix it and learn from it later as you continue to grow.

 

[SHlNEE]

I feel like I’m generally a genuine person, but I do realize that I am a hypocrite at times—then again, you wouldn’t be a functioning person in society if you had this naive sense of genuinely all the time
I believe it’s a matter of perspective tbh
Most people irl are fine with me, I’ve had a couple who thought that me being nice was a sign of my fakeness, whatever. I can’t control what others think of me if they’re set on it, so I may as well continue being myself, even if it comes off the wrong wag

you not human if you never a hypocrite
but like many other things, sometimes others are just more hypocrite than others
being like that few times a year is human
but when people call me out on acting like a hypocrite
when i realise they right i think its fair to admit to it, so i do , i don't have pride issues not being able to admit it then luckily

how did others think your kindness was fakeness? because you come across as TOO kind or something?

and yeah you right, you can't be good in literally everyones eyes, you can't control what people think of you even though you try to be genuine and real and true

but im happy to hear you try to be a good human being

 

[SHlNEE]

"Know who you are and accept it. People might like you - cool. People might dislike you - also cool." but know who YOU ARE and work with it.

i like this
the fact a lot of people don't accept themselves enough and not love themselves enough causes a lot of shit
for themselves and the others around them
such a tragedy

gotta admit sometimes shitty situations make me little insecure and mad
mad that i cannot understand why sometimes people do what they do and say what they say
i feel bad when i strongly can tell people are not being genuine with me honestly
but at the same time, is it worth it to dwell on it? no

life is weird as hell
try to enjoy it before its over as much as possible

 

[SHlNEE]

maybe you can hide certain parts of yourself from others but still be a genuine person because different people just bring out a different side of you and we don't all just have one personality we can stick to and instead have lots of different personalities for different situations and people.

All in all I think as long as you believe you're being the best and most genuine you it doesn't really matter what you actually are in the long run since either you're doing absolutely fine or you're doing the absolute worst and you'll fix it and learn from it later as you continue to grow.

i like that last part
was that totally coming from you or did you read that somewhere?
just too bad you not always able to fix everything you want to fix
as sometimes you too late etc


but about the ''believing you are'' part
i was thinking the other day, people constantly think good about themselves
and tell themselves stuff to make themself feel good
but yet in reality what they say to themselves is not always true

as it totally depends sometimes on how people receive your actions, right?

but in the end
as long as you got a clear head and mature mind and also open mind with yourself and people around you
i think then you can be really genuine enough to earn the title i guess
BUT there just too many people around nowadays that only care for themselves at the end of the day
and act fake and lie
and manipulate others to get what they want

im scared ill never meet someone as genuine as i think i can be
i have met too many shitty people over the past 20 years lol
for example

old job, i know for a fact i was being an honest and genuine person and co worker towards my manager
thought we really got along well
i always helped her when she was in a tough spot family wise
i listened to her a lot about private drama so she could vent
i even hugged her when she was crying at work
i helped her out with other things at work
i was trying so hard to be a good person to her because i felt like she was doing that for me as well
i thought she was the greatest manager ever and very genuine as well
i loved working with her
and i was really good at my job, nobody ever complained about me and the customers were 98% always in a happy mood when i was helping them so you would think you doing a good job right

but in the end, she totally let me down by firing me for 0 legit reasons and stabbed me in the back completely (letting me sign certain papers and two weeks later i was fired for no good reason at all) and also talking bad about me behind my back which MADE NO SENSE
considering she always talked so highly of me and was so happy to have me as co worker
never complained and gave me constantly compliments
HOW does one come across so genuine at first and then later on totally fucks you over like that?

it scares me a lot of people can also fake the genuine attitude so well
i felt so used and betrayed by this woman

 

[mysteric]

how did others think your kindness was fakeness? because you come across as TOO kind or something?

I mean, to be absolutely fair, that person did find another person in our friend group (a sweetheart, albeit on the quieter side) to be fake for being nice.. despite everyone else disagreeing

I try to remain civil with everyone, which comes at the expense of me not always always being loud about my opinions. Then again, I have a hard time genuinely disliking people lmao
I guess everything's just a balancing act

 

[NASA]

i like that last part
was that totally coming from you or did you read that somewhere?
just too bad you not always able to fix everything you want to fix
as sometimes you too late etc


but about the ''believing you are'' part
i was thinking the other day, people constantly think good about themselves
and tell themselves stuff to make themself feel good
but yet in reality what they say to themselves is not always true

as it totally depends sometimes on how people receive your actions, right?

but in the end
as long as you got a clear head and mature mind and also open mind with yourself and people around you
i think then you can be really genuine enough to earn the title i guess
BUT there just too many people around nowadays that only care for themselves at the end of the day
and act fake and lie
and manipulate others to get what they want

im scared ill never meet someone as genuine as i think i can be
i have met too many shitty people over the past 20 years lol
for example

old job, i know for a fact i was being an honest and genuine person and co worker towards my manager
thought we really got along well
i always helped her when she was in a tough spot family wise
i listened to her a lot about private drama so she could vent
i even hugged her when she was crying at work
i helped her out with other things at work
i was trying so hard to be a good person to her because i felt like she was doing that for me as well
i thought she was the greatest manager ever and very genuine as well
i loved working with her
and i was really good at my job, nobody ever complained about me and the customers were 98% always in a happy mood when i was helping them so you would think you doing a good job right

but in the end, she totally let me down by firing me for 0 legit reasons and stabbed me in the back completely (letting me sign certain papers and two weeks later i was fired for no good reason at all) and also talking bad about me behind my back which MADE NO SENSE
considering she always talked so highly of me and was so happy to have me as co worker
never complained and gave me constantly compliments
HOW does one come across so genuine at first and then later on totally fucks you over like that?

it scares me a lot of people can also fake the genuine attitude so well
i felt so used and betrayed by this woman

It was all pretty much from me, I mean I once had a talk with a support person at my college and a lot of the things she said helped me get into the mindset of thinking more positively about things that I thought were bad about myself and the way she managed to totally flip the perspective for some things made me realise that not everything is as black and white as we like to think they are. But during that time in general I was having a really rough time and had a lot of time to think about these things, first thinking just really negatively about it all and then as I was getting better I was able to reflect back on how I thought before and see things from a different perspective. And then once I was kind of doing alright I wasn't thinking completely positively of these things either because past depressed me had a point in thinking so negatively about certain things and I know that because I went through it and getting better doesn't change that, so rather than thinking overly positively i've started thinking a lot more just neutral where nothing is necessarily amazing but it's not terrible either and thats fine and i'm happy and satisfied with that.

That was sort of all over the place and probably doesn't make much sense lol

I've had a pretty bad experience like that too where I thought I knew them. I mean they're completely different situations like you can't really compare the two and I can't really explain what happened because after so long I sort of don't remember what happened myself because pretty much all of it happened as my mental health was spiraling out of control and is what I had to see the support staff at my college for. At the end of that whole thing my only wish was that I could just erase it all from my memory so I guess my wish is sort of coming true, only thing is it still hurts to see their name and very very rarely I still miss them too even though I shouldn't.