Have you ever broken up with someone? (1 Viewer)

[centen]

I've been on three dates with this person and I'm not feeling it, so I know I should say something, but ugh.

 

[HugeBakkaeMotae]

Trust me, it'll be a lot easier for the both of you if you nip it in the bud. You don't want to do this later when there are (serious) feelings involved. You're in luck that most men appreciate directness so if you want my advice don't drag it out or over-complicate it and just tell him the same thing you told us. If he's a decent guy he'll appreciate the honesty but if he does get upset don't back-pedal and and he'll appreciate it later. Can not stress enough that you should not compromise, insinuate or otherwise try to soften the blow because some people will never get it and it will cause unnecessary problems if he thinks he still has a chance so just be kind but direct.

 

[centen]

Trust me, it'll be a lot easier for the both of you if you nip it in the bud. You don't want to do this later when there are (serious) feelings involved. You're in luck that most men appreciate directness so if you want my advice don't drag it out or over-complicate it and just tell him the same thing you told us. If he's a decent guy he'll appreciate the honesty but if he does get upset don't back-pedal and and he'll appreciate it later. Can not stress enough that you should not compromise, insinuate or otherwise try to soften the blow because some people will never get it and it will cause unnecessary problems if he thinks he still has a chance so just be kind but direct.

Thank you for the kind advice!! I was thinking of just sending something like "It's been fun getting to know you, but I'm not really feeling a spark. Best of luck to you!" IDK how much to add, because there's nothing wrong with them -- they seem lovely and interesting, I'm just not feeling anything. We met on a dating app, so it's not, like, someone in my circle that I personally knew beforehand.

We did have a date last night, so it feels weird to be like "good morning, I'm breaking things off" It's more complicated for me than past dates, just because most of those have ended with it being very clear to both of us that we didn't mesh.

 

[StirFriedPanda]

I'm old enough I've even broken up with myself. 3 dates is barely friendly territory.

 

[Ahsoka]

I sort of have. It’s pretty complicated, but the whole relationship was me trying to convince myself I like dudes so it was really awkward throughout 10/10 don’t recommend.

 

[centen]

I'm old enough I've even broken up with myself. 3 dates is barely friendly territory.

That's fair, I've probably spent less than 10 hours with them total at this point. Which when put it like that, I'm not sure why I'm so worried.

 

[centen]

I sort of have. It’s pretty complicated, but the whole relationship was me trying to convince myself I like dudes so it was really awkward throughout 10/10 don’t recommend.

Why is dating so awkward?? I want it to be easy and fun and then when I'm over it, for them to disappear forever without needing any words.

 

[StirFriedPanda]

That's fair, I've probably spent less than 10 hours with them total at this point. Which when put it like that, I'm not sure why I'm so worried.

Its not love until you smelled eachothers farts. Then it gets awkward.

 

[Ahsoka]

Why is dating so awkward?? I want it to be easy and fun and then when I'm over it, for them to disappear forever without needing any words.

It can be awkward but can also be really great when you actually find the one So imo worth it. But maybe I’m just just spoiled because I’ve only needed to date two people to find them

 

[Nina]

I think 3 dates is safe to break it off with a text. There's nothing serious there so you dont have to meet.
And if it helps block the number for a while. Just my experience, but sometimes guys project their worse selves when rejected.
Say you're moving to the Falkland Islands if anything.

 

[eclipsoul]

no, but that's because i never had anyone to break up with hope things go well for you though!!

 

[centen]

I think 3 dates is safe to break it off with a text. There's nothing serious there so you dont have to meet.
And if it helps block the number for a while. Just my experience, but sometimes guys project their worse selves when rejected.
Say you're moving to the Falkland Islands if anything.

I sent the message, ugh, why does it feel hard!! Hopefully they won't be insane... People are always saying how they want women to be more straightforward... But I'm definitely prepared to block them everywhere if needed!!

 

[Nina]

I sent the message, ugh, why does it feel hard!! Hopefully they won't be insane... People are always saying how they want women to be more straightforward... But I'm definitely prepared to block them everywhere if needed!!

Exhale. The message is sent. And in case you’re wondering. its 54 F on the Falkland islands

 

[athenaaa]

Yes I have, but it has been a while since I have had to

 

[snsd2beg]

No, but I should have. Said person ended up dumping me thankfully. As a teenager, before I knew I was aromantic and had a lot of confusion regarding my emotions, I got into a relationship with a friend whom I almost immediately realized I was NOT into. But of course, I was so used to waiting stuff out in my life that I didn't break it off. Do not do that.
It is best to be honest with people. It's better in the long run.

 

[BlingyBlinger]

I broke up with someone over distance after we were no longer at the same school. She was lovely but long distance rarely ever works out

 

[Selfmate]

broken up and been broken up with lots of people

 

[HyuneSuga]

No I've only ever been broken up with. It's why I haven't dated in 4 years

 

[dark_tranquility]

5 times and counting

The thing is they all liked me first
then just tossed me aside at a moments notice
I still think it is my fault as well

 

[uran]

Ive been in relationship 7 times and have been the one breaking it every time