I've been thinking (1 Viewer)

[Day]

About having kids lately.

And before you get scared I do not want children but its because I recently learned the phrase "many people want a baby but don't want to be a parent" and the more I've been thinking about that I feel more comfortable saying that I would want to be a parent.

I think many people in my family and around me are the type that just want a baby without that baby becoming their own person with autonomy - they want an extension of themselves and that status of being a parent, but they'd disown their kids as soon as they don't do as they're told.

Do you want kids? Do you want a baby or to be a parent? Have you ever thought about it this way?

 

[athenaaa]

I do not want kids. However I like the caregiving aspect. I want to work with children and protect them and stuff like that. I just feel like I wouldn’t be able to be a parent per se.

 

[Day]

I do not want kids. However I like the caregiving aspect. I want to work with children and protect them and stuff like that. I just feel like I wouldn’t be able to be a parent per se.

We should open a KPS daycare where we can just be kind to kids every day do you want to be the principal?

 

[Magician]

I don't want to have kids
I'm a nursery school teacher and like to work with children, but I see the struggles parents have to face everyday
And with everything going on in this world, everything getting more expensiv, childcare is on the brink of collapse in many countries… no, thanks
And I love to come home and do whatever I want without being responsible for another human

 

[Day]

I don't want to have kids
I'm a nursery school teacher and like to work with children, but I see the struggles parents have to face everyday
And with everything going on in this world, everything getting more expensiv, childcare is on the brink of collapse in many countries… no, thanks
And I love to come home and do whatever I want without being responsible for another human

If I could magically adopt an 8 year old at the age of 38 I feel like that would be my perfect calling

 

[Magician]

If I could magically adopt an 8 year old at the age of 38 I feel like that would be my perfect calling

you can always become a forster mom!

 

[Day]

you can always become a forster mom!

I want to be a cat foster mom too hopefully that future kid doesn't have allergies

 

[MK3AM]

yes i do want to be a parent eventually i took a class and i had to wear a belky and then after i had to take care of a robot baby

 

[Day]

yes i do want to be a parent eventually i took a class and i had to wear a belky and then after i had to take care of a robot baby

I also had the robot baby but not the belly part

 

[ichigohon]

I want a family and it's a complete dealbreaker in a relationship if someone doesn't want kids. I tell them on the first date. I want 3-12 children, and if they say they don't want any or aren't open to at least 3 then we're not compatible and I move on. Also, I read dozens of Jewish books when I was in the process of converting (I stopped the process and I'm more Shinto/Tenrikyo adjacent now), but the Haredim perspective on children really stuck with me and changed my outlook on children completely. The quote from Rabbi Maimonides that " the birth of a child is the creation of an entire world. I.e., each potential child is endlessly valuable and infinitely necessary," is something I truly believe and while I never completed my conversion, I do believe that it is my goyim mitzvah to be fruitful and multiply just as it is a mitzvah for Jews.

However, in relation to what you: I agree completely that a lot of people want to have children, but want to view them as personal accessories because in modern developed societies (other than Israel) have essentially made children expensive luxury pets.

 

[Tickita]

The older I get, the less I want to. I know for a fact that I'll never give birth. Kids are on the table but it's getting pretty close to being tipped off. If I want children I'll foster.

 

[dark_tranquility]

I would want to if I was in better circumstances..
Otherwise it will have to wait.

 

[ichigohon]

The older I get, the less I want to. I know for a fact that I'll never give birth. Kids are on the table but it's getting pretty close to being tipped off. If I want children I'll foster.

I'd be very careful to know what you're getting into before fostering children. I often hear this said and I know you have good intentions, but my grandparents fostered kids most of my childhood and I had to have conversations with my parents and grandparents that were extremely dark to understand why their parents weren't allowed around them anymore and what I could and couldn't say to them. You will encounter a lot of damaged kids in that system that have truly horrific things that have happened to them. I would never foster children because I cannot deal with the trauma that they've experienced, but if you think you can I truly commend you for having a truly special heart to care for those at risk children because not everyone can

In the future, if you're seriously interested in pursuing that pathway, you can PM me so I can detail you the traumas that my grandparents had to deal with so you know what you're getting yourself into

 

[Tickita]

I'd be very careful to know what you're getting into before fostering children. I often hear this said and I know you have good intentions, but my grandparents fostered kids most of my childhood and I had to have conversations with my parents and grandparents that were extremely dark to understand why their parents weren't allowed around them anymore and what I could and couldn't say to them. You will encounter a lot of damaged kids in that system that have truly horrific things that have happened to them. I would never foster children because I cannot deal with the trauma that they've experienced, but if you think you can I truly commend you for having a truly special heart to care for those at risk children because not everyone can

In the future, if you're seriously interested in pursuing that pathway, you can PM me so I can detail you the traumas that my grandparents had to deal with so you know what you're getting yourself into

Yeah I've heard things myself. It's not a definite goal of mine, but I'm open to learning more about it. Feel free to hmu.

 

[ning]

I wouldnt mind kids but i would rather adopt a child at around 4-6 years olds, a baby would be too much for me

 

[Yelena_Belova]

I want to be a parent. 1-4 kids would be nice. I do want them to be their own person though. It would be boring if they were just like me 24/7. It took me way to long to learn who I was, so if they end up discovering that about themselves before I did, fantastic! I'd obviously support and love them too. I'm fine with any type of children: biological, adopted and/or fostered. Most likely a combination of them. I wouldn't treat any of them any better or worse depending on that though, it's too cruel and not something they can control.

 

[MK3AM]

I also had the robot baby but not the belly part

youre lucky then it was so heavy and i had to wear it around school

 

[athenaaa]

We should open a KPS daycare where we can just be kind to kids every day do you want to be the principal?

I’d rather be a preschool teacher

 

[Selfmate]

I want 3-12 children

that's uhhh ummmm...HUGE bloody range my friend lol

 

[Selfmate]

@Day I think I'm the only person on AKP with a child (let alone 2)

children are the most rewarding and yet most annoying thing that can ever happen to a person
they will utterly destroy ever fibre in your being but in the next minute have more love pouring from them than guiness from an irish pub...

there was a reason why when I was 32 and had my first son my parents said to me " now you are an adult "