Sensitive Losing all of my friends (1 Viewer)

[karenina]

I used to have a best friend but after I moved, we slowly grew apart but we still talk sometimes. I have 2 "best friends" in this new school that I had joined last year, but they seem to hate me now. My first friend keeps asking me for money, she even asked this random guy to get food for her, but she did not have money so she asked me to bring her money but I didn't have any so I explained to her that I can't and now she is upset. My other friend keeps hanging out with other people and when I talk to her in person, she is always texting someone else. I am quite lonely and my grades are going down, but that is not off too much concern since it's mostly since teachers are a bit behind since I turned in some assignments late. I am just very lonely and my depression is worsening, not sure what to do.

 

[uran]

I am so sorry you are going thrue this. I have never been the "important friend" in my irl friendships so i can understand how you might feel.
I really dont know how to fix it any other way than keep powering thrue and wait until you find that friend that just clicks.
Remember to also be yourself and never settle to be treated badly in your friendships

 

[HugeBakkaeMotae]

I might not be the right person to give advice on this sort of thing but I will tell you my personal philosophy; It is much better to be alone than surround yourself with people who make you miserable. That person asking for money does not sound like a friend at all. Maybe there is a misunderstanding so I would suggest talking to them first if you think that might help but if they blow you off for trying to have an honest heart to heart they are someone you are better off without. A lot of people, especially younger people (I don't know your age) don't really think much beyond themselves and it's not always malicious, they simply aren't realizing how they make you feel. So tell them, without hostility, if it doesn't work I suggest doing your best to find new friends.

Easier said than done, I know. I got no friends myself (thus why I said I might not be the ideal person to give advice) but I've cut off some toxic people in my life and it always made me feel healthier both physically and mentally. Will you be lonely? Probably yes. But don't you already feel lonely around people like that? So what will really change? Ask yourself these questions and make decisions based on your answers.

I hope you find some good friends who appreciate you, I have no doubt you deserve it. Remember that no matter how alone you feel it's never too late to make new friends, sometimes it might just take a while.. As long as you don't stop trying there's always hope. Meanwhile you have all of us here. :-)

 

[karenina]

I might not be the right person to give advice on this sort of thing but I will tell you my personal philosophy; It is much better to be alone than surround yourself with people who make you miserable. That person asking for money does not sound like a friend at all. Maybe there is a misunderstanding so I would suggest talking to them first if you think that might help but if they blow you off for trying to have an honest heart to heart they are someone you are better off without. A lot of people, especially younger people (I don't know your age) don't really think much beyond themselves and it's not always malicious, they simply aren't realizing how they make you feel. So tell them, without hostility, if it doesn't work I suggest doing your best to find new friends.

Easier said than done, I know. I got no friends myself (thus why I said I might not be the ideal person to give advice) but I've cut off some toxic people in my life and it always made me feel healthier both physically and mentally. Will you be lonely? Probably yes. But don't you already feel lonely around people like that? So what will really change? Ask yourself these questions and make decisions based on your answers.

I hope you find some good friends who appreciate you, I have no doubt you deserve it. Remember that no matter how alone you feel it's never too late to make new friends, sometimes it might just take a while.. As long as you don't stop trying there's always hope. Meanwhile you have all of us here. :-)

I'm 16 haha. I did talk to the friend and she's done this in the past. I saw her texting her boyfriend of 2 months one day about how he makes her so much happier then me and when I asked her about it, she began crying and called me her "chosen sister". I don't think she values my friendship tbh, she just likes using me and pretends to cry if I confront her about something. I'm an atheist but my parents are christian so they make me go to get togethers and yesterday, I had to sit at a separate table with the other teen girls and while I can make friends besides religion, we were way too different and they were just a bit too religious for my liking. I'm just tired, and I'm an introvert so I don't even like talking but I still feel lonely.

 

[karenina]

I'm 16 haha. I did talk to the friend and she's done this in the past. I saw her texting her boyfriend of 2 months one day about how he makes her so much happier then me and when I asked her about it, she began crying and called me her "chosen sister". I don't think she values my friendship tbh, she just likes using me and pretends to cry if I confront her about something. I'm an atheist but my parents are christian so they make me go to get togethers and yesterday, I had to sit at a separate table with the other teen girls and while I can make friends besides religion, we were way too different and they were just a bit too religious for my liking. I'm just tired, and I'm an introvert so I don't even like talking but I still feel lonely.

edited it, sorry if you read it before it made sense, English isn't my first language haha

 

[HugeBakkaeMotae]

I'm 16 haha. I did talk to the friend and she's done this in the past. I saw her texting her boyfriend of 2 months one day about how he makes her so much happier then her and when I asked her about it, she began crying and called me her "chosen sister". I don't think she values my friendship tbh, she just likes using me and pretends to cry if I confront her about something. I'm an atheist but my parents are christian so they make me go to get togethers and yesterday, I had to sit at a separate table with the other teen girls and while I can make friends besides religion, we were way too different and they were just a bit too religious for my liking. I'm just tired, and I'm an introvert so I don't even like talking but I still feel lonely.

You should trust your gut I think.

Human contact is as important as eating and breathing and loneliness can make one very sick no matter how introverted one is. I know this all too well as I've scored 100% I on the MBTI scale every time I tried it (if you believe in that stuff). I still feel lonely even though I also feel too exhausted to maintain relationships and don't particularly like being around people - and value my personal time deeply. It's a physical need I think and our minds and bodies just need to be near others even if we don't really want to.

I hold on to hope that it'll be easier with the right person but finding them is the trick, isn't it? K-Pop can help a lot in filling that hole but living parasocially is a fine line one must tread, just like any other medication one can't be too reliant and stop working on the core issue.

 

[Going_Under]

I'll be your friend!

 

[karenina]

I'll be your friend!

Thank you

 

[Going_Under]

Thank you

Ofc! I'm always looking to meet new people! I hope you feel better soon... I went through the same thing when I was in school

 

[pinkmelodies]

I am truly sorry you have to go through this change. I know it’s hard to realize right now, but they weren’t really your friends. They wouldn’t take advantage of you like that if they were. You are also have plenty of time to make new ones. Also as a fellow introvert, I understand how hard it is to initiate new ones. You deserve to surround yourself with the best people

 

[Yelena_Belova]

edited it, sorry if you read it before it made sense, English isn't my first language haha

Honestly, I never would have guessed that. Your English seems perfectly fine to me, at least when typed. I forget who said it, but there was a K-Pop idol who said English "requires confidence". Anyone who tries to tear you down for making mistakes in a second (or even later) language isn't a nice person.

 

[Yelena_Belova]

I'm sorry you're going through that. Neither person sounds like a good friend. You definitely deserve much better friends. If you want to, I nominate myself as one such friend.

 

[TrinityJade]

I can definitely relate to what you're going through right now, I went through the exact same thing last year. It saddens me to hear that one of my favorite users here is going through such an awful thing. None of those friends sound like good ones, and I truly wish that you'll be able to find genuine friends that care for you soon. If you ever want to talk, my DMs are always open for you <3

 

[karenina]

Ofc! I'm always looking to meet new people! I hope you feel better soon... I went through the same thing when I was in school

I'm sorry to hear that, I hope you are doing better now

 

[karenina]

I am truly sorry you have to go through this change. I know it’s hard to realize right now, but they weren’t really your friends. They wouldn’t take advantage of you like that if they were. You are also have plenty of time to make new ones. Also as a fellow introvert, I understand how hard it is to initiate new ones. You deserve to surround yourself with the best people

Thank you, I really appreciate it

 

[karenina]

Honestly, I never would have guessed that. Your English seems perfectly fine to me, at least when typed. I forget who said it, but there was a K-Pop idol who said English "requires confidence". Anyone who tries to tear you down for making mistakes in a second (or even later) language isn't a nice person.

Yeah, haha I'm German and we learn English in school of course but sometimes especially in topics like this when I want to express myself clearly, I hope my messages do not come off as wrong if that makes sense.

 

[Going_Under]

I am! and i'm here to try and help you too

I'm sorry to hear that, I hope you are doing better now

 

[karenina]

I'm sorry you're going through that. Neither person sounds like a good friend. You definitely deserve much better friends. If you want to, I nominate myself as one such friend.

Thank you, it means a lot to me

 

[karenina]

I can definitely relate to what you're going through right now, I went through the exact same thing last year. It saddens me to hear that one of my favorite users here is going through such an awful thing. None of those friends sound like good ones, and I truly wish that you'll be able to find genuine friends that care for you soon. If you ever want to talk, my DMs are always open for you <3

Thank you, I really appreciate you and I'm grateful you've always been here for me

 

[Pirioca]

I have 2 "best friends" in this new school that I had joined last year, but they seem to hate me now. My first friend keeps asking me for money, she even asked this random guy to get food for her, but she did not have money so she asked me to bring her money but I didn't have any so I explained to her that I can't and now she is upset.

Then she's no real friend.

I am just very lonely and my depression is worsening, not sure what to do.

Focus more on your grades, so you get distracted from your bad feelings. If there are school projects, participate. Join a sports club. Try to find friends outside of school. I'm not sure if you can do voluntary activities in your age, but it would be another way to meet new people and to do something important. The worst enemies of depression are activity and finding purpose in life.