Parents are weird (1 Viewer)

[The_LastRomeo]

Getting mad that I mentioned something bad from the past that they did, I am the one that experienced the pain of what you did but I am calmly mentioning it, why are you getting so hostile with me?

 

[centen]

Sorry friend. A lot of parents are too emotionally immature to actually be responsible for the well-being of another living being.

 

[lexus]

A lot of parent don’t like to be held accountable for their actions. Then they wonder why their kids don’t want much to do with them later in life

 

[Deleted member 74]

because deep down what you are telling them they did stirs unwanted emotions in them and makes them lash out at you through hostility. they're not emotionally mature enough to have that conversation with you, and there comes a point you realize you can't change people, not even your family.

 

[The_LastRomeo]

Sorry friend. A lot of parents are too emotionally immature to actually be responsible for the well-being of another living being.

While at the same time trying to teach how to control my emotions and calling me sensitive and emotional

 

[The_LastRomeo]

A lot of parent don’t like to be held accountable for their actions. Then they wonder why their kids don’t want much to do with them later in life

Yeah, my mom said to my dad that me and my siblings are probably not going to want to have anything to do with him when we move out. my dad knows this and is trying to use religion as a threat to get me to stay in contact when I leave, but I won't most likely and I hope God can forgive me

 

[The_LastRomeo]

because deep down what you are telling them they did stirs unwanted emotions in them and makes them lash out at you through hostility. they're not emotionally mature enough to have that conversation with you, and there comes a point you realize you can't change people, not even your family.

I wish my mom understood this, I genuinely think my dad won't ever change his ways. My mom and dad both had very bad childhoods, but my mom is really trying to break the cycle, my dad however acts like his childhood was SO bad while basically doing the exact behavior he complained about his mom doing.

 

[centen]

While at the same time trying to teach how to control my emotions and calling me sensitive and emotional

Being sensitive and emotional aren't bad things. Emotions are just signals. It's okay to be sad when sad things happen. It's actually a lot easier to just be sad than to be ashamed of being sad, so you're feeling bad on top of also being sad.

I know it's really, really hard to break out when your parents have taught you, IDK, to basically be compliant with their world view to make things easier for them. And it's scary to try something new and make things better. But it's definitely possible.

 

[The_LastRomeo]

Being sensitive and emotional aren't bad things. Emotions are just signals. It's okay to be sad when sad things happen. It's actually a lot easier to just be sad than to be ashamed of being sad, so you're feeling bad on top of also being sad.

I know it's really, really hard to break out when your parents have taught you, IDK, to basically be compliant with their world view to make things easier for them. And it's scary to try something new and make things better. But it's definitely possible.

I do know this, my dad likes to preach that emotions are bad while simultaneously being the most emotional man I know lol

 

[Deleted member 74]

I wish my mom understood this, I genuinely think my dad won't ever change his ways. My mom and dad both had very bad childhoods, but my mom is really trying to break the cycle, my dad however acts like his childhood was SO bad while basically doing the exact behavior he complained about his mom doing.

I so get this because it's exactly my experience too, perhaps your dad back when he was young also wanted to never end up like his mum or do the things his mum did, but sometimes they just can't break out of the generational trauma cycle sadly.

 

[dark_tranquility]

my dad doesn't even know I worked before
and he is passive aggressive

if he bothered to ask me, he'd know that

 

[The_LastRomeo]

I so get this because it's exactly my experience too, perhaps your dad back when he was young also wanted to never end up like his mum or do the things his mum did, but sometimes they just can't break out of the generational trauma cycle sadly.

But the problem is that he think he has, he thinks he's doing a great job but has shunned us since we were kids. He never wanted to do anything with us and always broke his promises, while parading around that he's the best father we could ever have. He thinks that because he didn't abandon us physically he didn't do it emotionally and mentally, and tells us that if we wanted to talk about something with him we could but immediately makes us the villains when we try...

 

[The_LastRomeo]

my dad doesn't even know I worked before
and he is passive aggressive

if he bothered to ask me, he'd know that

My dad is also passive aggressive, condescending, rude, apathetic, so i definitely understand not telling him

 

[dark_tranquility]

My dad is also passive aggressive, condescending, rude, apathetic, so i definitely understand not telling him

some parents are just in the dark about their families