Take this money or I don't love you any more! (1 Viewer)

[StirFriedPanda]

This is so cute and wholesome!

 

[Ahsoka]

It’s a nice gesture but it’s also pretty depressing

 

[StirFriedPanda]

It’s a nice gesture but it’s also pretty depressing

Why?

 

[Ahsoka]

Why?

I feel like in general with older people it’s rare enough that someone want to visit them or help them that they feel that if someone does it’s an odd occurrence and deserves a reward, vs seeing It as them wanting to spend time and help of their own free will because they care

 

[The_LastRomeo]

Awww

 

[StirFriedPanda]

I feel like in general with older people it’s rare enough that someone want to visit them or help them that they feel that if someone does it’s an odd occurrence and deserves a reward, vs seeing It as them wanting to spend time and help of their own free will because they care

I've been where that person was. You just wanted to do a nice thing and don't need a reward but I also realized something even more important. Those old folks are from a generation where you took care of yourself and it's really hard for them to "need help" let alone ask and accept that help. This person didn't accept a reward, they helped those people feel independent. If you really don't want to be paid or a reward you can donate it etc but them feeling independent is really really important at their age.

 

[Ahsoka]

I've been where that person was. You just wanted to do a nice thing and don't need a reward but I also realized something even more important. Those old folks are from a generation where you took care of yourself and it's really hard for them to "need help" let alone ask and accept that help. This person didn't accept a reward, they helped those people feel independent. If you really don't want to be paid or a reward you can donate it etc but them feeling independent is really really important at their age.

I’m not saying that this case is exactly what I described, but the similarity of that to what I described made me think of it, and i think it would be hard to argue that cases like what I said dont exist. The nursing home being full of lonely people dumped by their kids stereotype exists for a reason. Additionally, what you’re saying about helping them feel independent is also not fully positive, people needing to do that to feel able to ask help isn’t great either. I know it’s not going to change just like that and everyone will feel great about everything and so on, but id be not that happy that they feel that way if I cared about them, though like I said I know it’s not easy to just change the mentality.