What defines strict parenting? (1 Viewer)

[athenaaa]

What criteria makes a strict parent? Certian bedtimes, rules about dating, restrictions on screentime, etc?

Do you think your parents were strict? If you have kids, does that influence how you parents? If you wish to have kids, will you parent’s parenting style affect how you raise your future children?​

 

[Selfmate]

strict parenting - when the rules set go beyond what would be considered "normal" by the reasonable standards of one's background, social economic status, ethnicity, nationality

for example what would be considered strict in terms education in say US or Australia probably wouldn't be in China

 

[athenaaa]

for example what would be considered strict in terms education in say US or Australia probably wouldn't be in China

I am curious in what sense. Do you mind giving an example? I don’t know a whole lot about either educational system but if I were to make a guess, Canada’s system would probably be closer to US or Australia as opposed to China

 

[Ahsoka]

I guess more strict than average is strict, at least compared to those around you. Some cultures will be more strict in various ways. My parents mostly only were strict about education, but not as strict as in many other countries

 

[Selfmate]

I am curious in what sense. Do you mind giving an example? I don’t know a whole lot about either educational system but if I were to make a guess, Canada’s system would probably be closer to US or Australia as opposed to China

beyond for example the focus towards academic pursuits - the system is designed to focus solely (mostly) on the pursuit of higher education

one has to take a test in primary (elementary school) in order to go to a prestigious middle school and again another test there to go to a prestigious high school and again another test to go to a prestigious high school

for middle school and high school onwards extra curricular activities are limited to basically studying since schools will give out so much homework that one would be lucky to complete it in a night

for example my wife (who is chinese chinese) would sometimes stay up till like 1 or 2 am in high school to complete homework lol

 

[athenaaa]

beyond for example the focus towards academic pursuits - the system is designed to focus solely (mostly) on the pursuit of higher education

one has to take a test in primary (elementary school) in order to go to a prestigious middle school and again another test there to go to a prestigious high school and again another test to go to a prestigious high school

for middle school and high school onwards extra curricular activities are limited to basically studying since schools will give out so much homework that one would be lucky to complete it in a night

for example my wife (who is chinese chinese) would sometimes stay up till like 1 or 2 am in high school to complete homework lol

Interesting, that definitely wasn’t the case where I grew up. Either you went to a school that was nearby (usually feeder schools from your previous one), you switch from public to catholic boards (or vice versa), you take an exam and do an interview to get into a really prestigious high school (this is the rarest option but had a friend who did this then experienced burnout), or you Pay to go to a private school

 

[The_LastRomeo]

I think how I grew up was pretty strict, I don't have a problem with it tho

When I was younger I was told to go to bed at 4:00 pm, I didn't have to sleep but I had to stay in my room
I ate only when I was allowed to (We were kinda broke) which was breakfast, lunch, and dinner with the occasional sweet
Tv was from after school (3:00) to bed time except for weekends, and there were years when I didn't watch TV at all, it was some sort of detox
I didn't get a phone until I was 12 and originally it was only for phone calls but was switched to only 2 hours a day

 

[Selfmate]

Interesting, that definitely wasn’t the case where I grew up. Either you went to a school that was nearby (usually feeder schools from your previous one), you switch from public to catholic boards (or vice versa), you take an exam and do an interview to get into a really prestigious high school (this is the rarest option but had a friend who did this then experienced burnout), or you Pay to go to a private school

canada seems very similar to Australia

the difference is that in China there is no social safety net and the top jobs and most attractive careers tend to be mostly academic focused...
and with a popular of 1.4 billion people there's lots and lots of competition

 

[dark_tranquility]

My father was in the navy

so he had strict parenting methods

thankful for it, now that I look back

 

[Lexie]

My parent is pretty lenient. They have some rules and such, but overall they are quite loose on rules. Their only rules that they are strict about is no drugs.

 

[Flaneur]

I mean we do have a few rules in this house
1. No going out after 8 pm
2. No dating till 20

But other than those my parents are cool with everything else, I really don't think their parenting style will effect mine ever

 

[Belgizen]

it depends tbh.

I'd say my parents were strict with me but not my sis since they wanted to know all my classes and when I was done with school, even in college and if I went out with friends, they wanted to know who. Wasn't allowed to drink alcohol either even though I could legally.
Prom I had to leave the earliest at 1 AM
My sis never had these rules

 

[SnowWhite]

Agree it very much so depends on where you are from. In the US i am pretty sure the parents kinda let go of the rules by the time their kid is 18, but where i used to live in the middle east that would NOT be the case specially if you are a girl. It can be anything, from your study habits, how you dress, sex before marriage is bad enough for some families to cut ties with their kid. I was shocked when my sister said her 24 year old friend removes her lipstick and changes clothes before her family come to pick her up at the university.

I study abroad but some parents wont even let their kids go to university in a city nearby. I am honestly glad my parents are like that. Tbh they wouldnt even give a f**k if i wore makeup or dyed my hair and didnt study much before i was 18. They never really went to teacher parent meetings, not that they didnt care. They just didnt find it important? And why would they bother to meet my teachers or force me to study countless hours anyway? Im a medical student now without them putting any pressure on me as a kid. That is every Asian parents' dream.