Arranged Marriage? (1 Viewer)

[Myth]

Well, if the arrangement was to look after everyone's happiness I don't see why being bi would exclude you options your open to.

No I get that, but traditionally, arrange marriages and ig marriages in general really, expect natural born children. I don’t think most cultures with arrange marriages have evolved to be that inclusive as of now. I am looking at it through a sort of current world lens.

in an ideal scenario where it is for happiness and really is taking account what the partners want and not just furthering the family line or whatever, maybe it could be appealing. I am undecided on it though.

 

[litc]

Yes, generally a human interviews everyone involved and puts two people together that have the best possibility in their opinion of making it. I hightly recommend watching Indian Matchmaker on Netflix. Many of the parents they interview were the product of arranged marriages and I was amazing at how happy they seemed.

lol my parents are Indian and have an arranged marriage I know all about that stuff

 

[StirFriedPanda]

No, that sounds like my worst nightmare.

What if the match was that Chan guy?

 

[litc]

lol my parents are Indian and have an arranged marriage I know all about that stuff

Also it’s not all that great my grandma dropped out of high school so my great grandparents got her married, ar age 16, to a 30 year old man (my grandfather)

in the olden days they married off 6 year old girls to men in their 30s and 11 year old girls to old men in their 60s

this is the threat, do good in school, or you can drop out and get married off to an old man

 

[StirFriedPanda]

Also it’s not all that great my grandma dropped out of high school so my great grandparents got her married, ar age 16, to a 30 year old man (my grandfather)

in the olden days they married off 6 year old girls to men in their 30s and 11 year old girls to old men in their 60s

this is the threat, do good in school, or you can drop out and get married off to an old man

Yeah, I'd run away... or end up with an old dead husband...

 

[litc]

Yeah, I'd run away... or end up with an old dead husband...

Child marriage is still legal in the US, cuz how can minors get married? With parents permission

so if they’re the ones arranging the marriage in the first place …

 

[litc]

Child marriage is still legal in the US, cuz how can minors get married? With parents permission

so if they’re the ones arranging the marriage in the first place …

Seems like a @LudaLupin thread topic

 

[Ahsoka]

Child marriage is still legal in the US, cuz how can minors get married? With parents permission

so if they’re the ones arranging the marriage in the first place …

In some parts of the US I think yeah, which is pretty messed up imo.

 

[Ahsoka]

Also I see a difference between different types of arranged marriages. If the arranged part is pairing you with someone who might mesh well is much different than taking your choice out of equation or pressuring you into it. I’d rather just have my own feelings and emotions lead me. If I ever wanted something as a set up, I could just go on a dating app, which would probably be better for me because I know my feelings and preferences more than others anyways, so I don’t see any real benefit to an arranged marriage for me.

 

[litc]

In some parts of the US I think yeah, which is pretty messed up imo.

It’s in a majority of parts basically, very few don’t allow anyone under 18 to get married like Delaware and Kentucky and Massachusetts unfortunately . The range varies with state, at Arkansas it’s 17 with parental consent, and could still be parents forcing a 17 year old to marry a 45 year old, it’s mostly 16, which makes threats of marrying a 16 year old to a middle aged man if she doesn’t do well in school real, but some have younger even, like California just says younger than 18 can with one parents permission not even a minimum age given

 

[litc]

Also I see a difference between different types of arranged marriages. If the arranged part is pairing you with someone who might mesh well is much different than taking your choice out of equation or pressuring you into it. I’d rather just have my own feelings and emotions lead me. If I ever wanted something as a set up, I could just go on a dating app, which would probably be better for me because I know my feelings and preferences more than others anyways, so I don’t see any real benefit to an arranged marriage for me.

Omg I was actually smart saying a matchmaker is like a human dating app

 

[Ahsoka]

It’s in a majority of parts basically, very few don’t allow anyone under 18 to get married like Delaware and Kentucky and Massachusetts unfortunately . The range varies with state, at Arkansas it’s 17 with parental consent, and could still be parents forcing a 17 year old to marry a 45 year old, it’s mostly 16, which makes threats of marrying a 16 year old to a middle aged man if she doesn’t do well in school real, but some have younger even, like California just says younger than 18 can with one parents permission not even a minimum age given

Yeah I do think it’s too common in the US and should really be disallowed.

 

[litc]

Yeah I do think it’s too common in the US and should really be disallowed.

There was some news article a few years ago about a 10 year old being legally married to someone in their 40s lemme find

 

[StirFriedPanda]

Child marriage is still legal in the US, cuz how can minors get married? With parents permission

so if they’re the ones arranging the marriage in the first place …

Yeah, I meant this to be strictly, your an adult, your family gets no say and you do it voluntarily with the hopes you end up happy. I think in instances where someone's getting married under the age of 18 they should be interviewed alone, by a neutral party who's only priority is the safety AND happiness of said minor. The interviewer should determine the reason for the marriage, the maturity of both parties And under the age of 16, even if it's in your religion is a no go.

 

[litc]

There was some news article a few years ago about a 10 year old being legally married to someone in their 40s lemme find

I couldn’t find it but a report said in 2020 a few kids were married at age 10

 

[StirFriedPanda]

I couldn’t find it but a report said in 2020 a few kids were married at age 10

That should never happen on US soil and if it happens over seas the second that kids feet touches US soil they should be taken away from anyone who helped, arranged, or knew about the marriage and did nothing. Anyone who helped or arranged the marriage should be arrested for child abuse. If it was up to me there might even be air strikes on foreign soil to take out who ever the kid got married to... I guess that's why I'm not president...

 

[litc]

That should never happen on US soil and if it happens over seas the second that kids feet touches US soil they should be taken away from anyone who helped, arranged, or knew about the marriage and did nothing. Anyone who helped or arranged the marriage should be arrested for child abuse. If it was up to me there might even be air strikes on foreign soil to take out who ever the kid got married to... I guess that's why I'm not president...

It was in the us, parental consent

 

[StirFriedPanda]

It was in the us, parental consent

There are some rights even parents shouldn't have...

 

[Ahsoka]

I couldn’t find it but a report said in 2020 a few kids were married at age 10

Wikipedia says that 3 10 year old girls in Tenesse were married away to guys ranging from 24-31 years old back in 2001 which I’m guessing are the ones you’re talking about.

 

[litc]

Wikipedia says that 3 10 year old girls in Tenesse were married away to guys ranging from 24-31 years old back in 2001 which I’m guessing are the ones you’re talking about.

The ten year old girls it says was 2000 - 2010

but no I know a saw a recent article in high school

but here are some general stats ig

US child marriage SHAME: girls in mid-teens still wed older adult men

Girls in their mid-teens get trapped in abusive unions because they can be seen by police as child runaways, get rejected from women's refuges and can be too young to start divorce proceedings.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Honestly she might’ve been 11 or 12 and not exactly 10 and I forgot the age and so can’t find the article