Sensitive i need help... (1 Viewer)

[frocho]

I hope you guys can help and I know it's dumb to feel depressed because of these things:
I'm tired of trying to seem happy all the time. My best friend is moving away and she was the only one who ever understood me. The sad thing is though that she is a bad influence on me and I know she is but I don't have anyone else. I have really bad social anxiety so I can't even manage to talk to anyone. I get made fun of in school and one time, this girl saw me watching NCT and she said "Why are you watching people who started the coronavirus!?" This boy gave me a note saying that he likes me and I was so happy since I had been rejected about 20 times since kindergarten. I don't remember kindergarten a lot but I remember that day perfectly. I came up to this boy and told him I liked him and he said 'Why would I like someone who looks like they crawled out of a dumpster?" The other times I've been rejected they always say the same thing: You're nice but you're not my type. It turned out that the boy who gave me a note did that on a dare and he only did it because he knew that I would believe him since I'm too ugly to ever get anyone. Plus, there's this cute boy that I like in my science class and I told my mom about it. She was very happy about it until I told her that he's Asian and I saw the disappointment on her face and she just said "That's nice". She was so happy until she knew that he was Asian and a different race than me. Every time I get a k-pop album, I'm terrified because I know my parents will make rude comments about how they look and how I can even like this music when I'm not Korean and I don't understand it. I know these are dumb reasons to be depressed but every single day, I'm wishing that I could die but I could never do it. I know that I don't deserve anyone and that I look like a raccoon that crawled out of a sewer but I still wish that I would have someone who would understand me and love me for who I am.

 

[litc]

I hope you guys can help and I know it's dumb to feel depressed because of these things:
I'm tired of trying to seem happy all the time. My best friend is moving away and she was the only one who ever understood me. The sad thing is though that she is a bad influence on me and I know she is but I don't have anyone else. I have really bad social anxiety so I can't even manage to talk to anyone. I get made fun of in school and one time, this girl saw me watching NCT and she said "Why are you watching people who started the coronavirus!?" This boy gave me a note saying that he likes me and I was so happy since I had been rejected about 20 times since kindergarten. I don't remember kindergarten a lot but I remember that day perfectly. I came up to this boy and told him I liked him and he said 'Why would I like someone who looks like they crawled out of a dumpster?" The other times I've been rejected they always say the same thing: You're nice but you're not my type. It turned out that the boy who gave me a note did that on a dare and he only did it because he knew that I would believe him since I'm too ugly to ever get anyone. Plus, there's this cute boy that I like in my science class and I told my mom about it. She was very happy about it until I told her that he's Asian and I saw the disappointment on her face and she just said "That's nice". She was so happy until she knew that he was Asian and a different race than me. Every time I get a k-pop album, I'm terrified because I know my parents will make rude comments about how they look and how I can even like this music when I'm not Korean and I don't understand it. I know these are dumb reasons to be depressed but every single day, I'm wishing that I could die but I could never do it. I know that I don't deserve anyone and that I look like a raccoon that crawled out of a sewer but I still wish that I would have someone who would understand me and love me for who I am.

I think you’re important

 

[frocho]

I think you’re important

Thank you, I wish I could feel the same about myself.

 

[litc]

As for looks don’t care what random ppl think about your looks as ppl are multi faceted and looks are only a single part of a person and there are a plenty of other things about you as well. It sucks your parents are racist

but if nct makes you happy who cares what they think

i don’t think I can help much but I have a song I wrote when I was 15 for a friend when I thought she didn’t think highly enough of herself if that would help

i won’t post it in this thread

 

[Selfmate]

you seem young my friend and in HS so understand that it's not the be all and end all of things
one day you'll grow out of it

and don't feel sad about failure or rejection - failure is the mother of success

"I'll take 99 rejections for all I need is one success to find my soulmate"

and about your friend - it reminds me of this song

 

[athenaaa]

Please know that you are important I know it may be hard right now but you have a bright future ahead. I relate to some of the things you said, especially about struggling to make friends. People will come and go in your life but you’re not alone. If you ever need anything, my DMs are open.

 

[frocho]

As for looks don’t care what random ppl think about your looks as ppl are multi faceted and looks are only a single part of a person and there are a plenty of other things about you as well. It sucks your parents are racist

but if nct makes you happy who cares what they think

i don’t think I can help much but I have a song I wrote when I was 15 for a friend when I thought she didn’t think highly enough of herself if that would help

i won’t post it in this thread

Ok! Do you want to DM it to me?

 

[frocho]

Please know that you are important I know it may be hard right now but you have a bright future ahead. I relate to some of the things you said, especially about struggling to make friends. People will come and go in your life but you’re not alone. If you ever need anything, my DMs are open.

Thank you :)

 

[frocho]

you seem young my friend and in HS so understand that it's not the be all and end all of things
one day you'll grow out of it

and don't feel sad about failure or rejection - failure is the mother of success

"I'll take 99 rejections for all I need is one success to find my soulmate"

and about your friend - it reminds me of this song

Thank you, I'll listen to it when I get a chance

 

[litc]

Ok! Do you want to DM it to me?

I’ll dm you the lyrics yeah

 

[frocho]

I’ll dm you the lyrics yeah

Thank you

 

[Day]

I hope you guys can help and I know it's dumb to feel depressed because of these things:
I'm tired of trying to seem happy all the time. My best friend is moving away and she was the only one who ever understood me. The sad thing is though that she is a bad influence on me and I know she is but I don't have anyone else. I have really bad social anxiety so I can't even manage to talk to anyone. I get made fun of in school and one time, this girl saw me watching NCT and she said "Why are you watching people who started the coronavirus!?" This boy gave me a note saying that he likes me and I was so happy since I had been rejected about 20 times since kindergarten. I don't remember kindergarten a lot but I remember that day perfectly. I came up to this boy and told him I liked him and he said 'Why would I like someone who looks like they crawled out of a dumpster?" The other times I've been rejected they always say the same thing: You're nice but you're not my type. It turned out that the boy who gave me a note did that on a dare and he only did it because he knew that I would believe him since I'm too ugly to ever get anyone. Plus, there's this cute boy that I like in my science class and I told my mom about it. She was very happy about it until I told her that he's Asian and I saw the disappointment on her face and she just said "That's nice". She was so happy until she knew that he was Asian and a different race than me. Every time I get a k-pop album, I'm terrified because I know my parents will make rude comments about how they look and how I can even like this music when I'm not Korean and I don't understand it. I know these are dumb reasons to be depressed but every single day, I'm wishing that I could die but I could never do it. I know that I don't deserve anyone and that I look like a raccoon that crawled out of a sewer but I still wish that I would have someone who would understand me and love me for who I am.

I empathize with a lot of what you said, but I want you to know that your younger years are the ones where you will experience the most cruelty. I am sorry that you've had to experience that kind of xenophobia, that's never okay, but that is on those other people for being the problem, not you. Don't let those kinds of people ridicule you, they're the ones who will fail at life. The most important thing you should focus on is being yourself and not letting other people dismiss your interests. My advice would be that, whenever someone says some kinda dumb shit toward you, pause and stare them for 4 seconds without saying anything - this is a sign of rejection to them and it may cause them to rethink or backtrack on what they said. I would not acknowledge their words or try to defend yourself either, if anything it's embarrassing that they cannot fathom listening to music outside of wherever you're from. It's giving 'live under a rock' energy on them tbh.

You deserve life, there's no one in this world that deserves death. Life can be whatever you shape it into and it will mold around what you desire. Ignore everyone and anything that gets in your way of happiness, for happiness is the only way you can live without regrets. If you need any help, feel free to send me a DM. I had a unique experience growing up and maybe hearing my thoughts you might see similarities.

 

[litc]

I empathize with a lot of what you said, but I want you to know that your younger years are the ones where you will experience the most cruelty. I am sorry that you've had to experience that kind of xenophobia, that's never okay, but that is on those other people for being the problem, not you. Don't let those kinds of people ridicule you, they're the ones who will fail at life. The most important thing you should focus on is being yourself and not letting other people dismiss your interests. My advice would be that, whenever someone says some kinda dumb shit toward you, pause and stare them for 4 seconds without saying anything - this is a sign of rejection to them and it may cause them to rethink or backtrack on what they said. I would not acknowledge their words or try to defend yourself either, if anything it's embarrassing that they cannot fathom listening to music outside of wherever you're from. It's giving 'live under a rock' energy on them tbh.

You deserve life, there's no one in this world that deserves death. Life can be whatever you shape it into and it will mold around what you desire. Ignore everyone and anything that gets in your way of happiness, for happiness is the only way you can live without regrets. If you need any help, feel free to send me a DM. I had a unique experience growing up and maybe hearing my thoughts you might see similarities.

Big time wisdom

 

[Yelena_Belova]

After reading all of this I can't help but feel bad for you. That sounds awful. I'm sorry that so many people in your life are xenophobic. That's never okay under any circumstances. There's nothing wrong with liking NCT or having a crush on someone who is Asain, and I hope your mom and classmates realuze that soon.

Having a school full of bullies sucks, I speak from experience sadly. I wish they could learn their lesson soon. I'm sorry that people have been being so mean to you and I hope one day you end up finding that special person that you love. I believe that there's someone out there for everyone and that you'll meet one day, so try not to give up hope. I'm sure you look very beautiful. I have some friends who don't look great, but I think they look gorgeous. Sometimes we can be our own harshest critics.

If it's at all possible, does your school have any sort of a therapist or guidance counselor you could see? Of course theraphy isn't some magic wand you can wave to suddenly make all your problems disappear, but it sounds like you're going through a lot and could use some help. If your school does have one, usually they're free to visit, which is nice.

As for having other people in your life, as sad as it is that you aren't really close to anyone in real life, and the only friend you had is moving away (I've had that happen before too quite a few times and it hurts a lot), never forget that you have the people on here. We love and care for you. I know I do at least. If you ever need to vent to me about anything, or even just want to make a new friend, my DM's are always open. I wish I could do more to help, but I don't think I can. Let me know if there is anything though.

 

[frocho]

After reading all of this I can't help but feel bad for you. That sounds awful. I'm sorry that so many people in your life are xenophobic. That's never okay under any circumstances. There's nothing wrong with liking NCT or having a crush on someone who is Asain, and I hope your mom and classmates realuze that soon.

Having a school full of bullies sucks, I speak from experience sadly. I wish they could learn their lesson soon. I'm sorry that people have been being so mean to you and I hope one day you end up finding that special person that you love. I believe that there's someone out there for everyone and that you'll meet one day, so try not to give up hope. I'm sure you look very beautiful. I have some friends who don't look great, but I think they look gorgeous. Sometimes we can be our own harshest critics.

If it's at all possible, does your school have any sort of a therapist or guidance counselor you could see? Of course theraphy isn't some magic wand you can wave to suddenly make all your problems disappear, but it sounds like you're going through a lot and could use some help. If your school does have one, usually they're free to visit, which is nice.

As for having other people in your life, as sad as it is that you aren't really close to anyone in real life, and the only friend you had is moving away (I've had that happen before too quite a few times and it hurts a lot), never forget that you have the people on here. We love and care for you. I know I do at least. If you ever need to vent to me about anything, or even just want to make a new friend, my DM's are always open. I wish I could do more to help, but I don't think I can. Let me know if there is anything though.

Thank you so much! My school does have a counselor but I have had a bad experience with them in the past (I'd rather not share) so now I have a really big fear of them.

 

[Yelena_Belova]

Thank you so much! My school does have a counselor but I have had a bad experience with them in the past (I'd rather not share) so now I have a really big fear of them.

Anytime! That sucks. I've had bad experiences with some therapists in the past, so I understand. I hope you find a much better one in the futurevif that's what you want.

 

[frocho]

Anytime! That sucks. I've had bad experiences with some therapists in the past, so I understand. I hope you find a much better one in the futurevif that's what you want.

That is what I want so hopefully I will find a good one :)