Sensitive What Conditions (1 Viewer)

[raymondchouku]

What conditions would a family member or close friend have to meet for you to ice them out for the remainder of you, or their, life?

 

[Ahsoka]

Ngl I thought I would cut my grandma out of my life but that’s hard to do without causing other family issues
So idk, if I can put up with her it would take a decent amount to beat that. Obviously it’s possible, but realistically not likely to happen for my family.

 

[hxney_jun]

theoretically. probably when i realize that its their commentary that holds me back from my potential the most.

 

[athenaaa]

When I realized they only kept talking to me because they wanted money or other things from me

 

[centen]

To go complete no contact with, they'd have to be actually abusive. Not kind of annoying, not tedious to deal with. I think sometimes people jump too quickly to "this confrontation would be uncomfortable, so I'm just going to cut them off" and then they wonder why they're so lonely. No one is perfect, so I think the bar for completely dumping someone very close to you should be pretty high and, barring a dangerous situation, you should first try to resolve it or set boundaries. No one is a mind reader, and very few people will ever actually be actively out to get you, so assuming constant ill intent is just needlessly tormenting yourself.

My grandma is tedious to deal with and our political beliefs don't line up, but I'm not going to dump an elderly sick woman to navigate the system alone. I just don't talk politics with her.

 

[BlingyBlinger]

Thankfully I don't see many members of my family doing this, but opening calling me a slur would be the straw that breaks my back

 

[Ahsoka]

To go complete no contact with, they'd have to be actually abusive. Not kind of annoying, not tedious to deal with. I think sometimes people jump too quickly to "this confrontation would be uncomfortable, so I'm just going to cut them off" and then they wonder why they're so lonely. No one is perfect, so I think the bar for completely dumping someone very close to you should be pretty high and, barring a dangerous situation, you should first try to resolve it or set boundaries. No one is a mind reader, and very few people will ever actually be actively out to get you, so assuming constant ill intent is just needlessly tormenting yourself.

My grandma is tedious to deal with and our political beliefs don't line up, but I'm not going to dump an elderly sick woman to navigate the system alone. I just don't talk politics with her.

I think the problem is some people don’t understand that blood isn’t everything, and they expect you to put up with anything because you’re related. If you can set boundaries, that’s good, but I just feel like the concept of boundaries within family can just be very hard to grasp for some people, and that even if a relationship isn’t abusive, but is unpleasant to the point that is affecting you constantly on a negative way (mental or physical, and I don’t mean a one time argument or something) it’s fine to cut them off. Plenty of people survive without said family member being in their life, it’s not worth it for you to maintain a relationship that is essentially all taking by one person and no giving imo.

 

[Selfmate]

it would be rare considering I'm pretty close to my family
obviously not everyone is and everybody's situation is different

repeated breach of trust - a family like most relationships is fundamentally built upon trust and if tht's broken it's very hard to repair

 

[dark_tranquility]

I would never distance any of my family.
I love them too much to ice them.

friends though I would.

 

[ichigohon]

I haven't spoken to my dad or step-mom since August 26th, 2021 and there's too much to go into, but we've gotten into two physical fist fights before and he consistently has treated me like I was the same age when my mom divorced him and constantly belittles me to my face and has humiliated me many times in public and around family.

 

[Ineul_Ze]

Cross one of my boundaries even once.

I do not speak to almost 99% of my family and that is due to them having no concept of boundaries or basic manners. I’ve found many friends to be more like family than I have ever found my family to be. The only people from my family I keep in contact with are my mother and grandmother.

As for friends, if I have to explain a boundary more than twice I stop speaking to them. I’ve been burned a few times in the past for being a doormat so I have very little tolerance for the red flags now.

 

[dark_tranquility]

I haven't spoken to my dad or step-mom since August 26th, 2021 and there's too much to go into, but we've gotten into two physical fist fights before and he consistently has treated me like I was the same age when my mom divorced him and constantly belittles me to my face and has humiliated me many times in public and around family.

Seems like a genuine asshole.
I am sorry you had that ordeal with family

 

[ichigohon]

Seems like a genuine asshole.
I am sorry you had that ordeal with family

It's fine. I still follow his columns (he still writes for the newspaper he used to work at) & that's enough for me. He seems to be doing a better job at being a grandparent to my step-sister's children so I'm happy that they get to experience the father I never got to experience even though I'm his only son. I excluded a lot of what happened, but anytime I interact with him or my stepmother it was miserable and has been like that for nearly a decade.

 

[Myth]

ig if I felt unsafe around them.