Why is this the first response? (1 Viewer)

[Wingfrost]

When you show non kpop fans pictures of boy group members, in my experience the first response has always been “They look like girls.”

Why? Because they’re wearing makeup? Their clothes? Because they don’t meet the stereotypical “manly” look?
I know this is an old topic that has been ongoing for years but it’s still something I just don’t understand to this day.
What do you all think?

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[seungfloral]

They are used to ugly dudes

 

[Hoemantic]

A lot of it comes from toxic masculinity and homophobia deeply rooted into the western society. In our ''standards'', it's not manly for a man to groom himself, to wear makeup and to be effeminate, which is ridiculous in my opinion. I think it's getting better the past few years though, people aren't afraid to call out those insensitive comments anymore. I say this as someone who loves kpop since 2012, I feel like it was much worse back then when kpop was niche.

 

[athenaaa]

A lot of it comes from toxic masculinity and homophobia deeply rooted into the western society. In our ''standards'', it's not manly for a man to groom himself, to wear makeup and to be effeminate, which is ridiculous in my opinion. I think it's getting better the past few years though, people aren't afraid to call out those insensitive comments anymore. I say this as someone who loves kpop since 2012, I feel like it was much worse back then when kpop was niche.

Completely agree ^^

 

[Ahsoka]

Come on wing, you mean to tell me they should be able to have hair? And eyes? And a nose? Those are so girly smh get your shit together

 

[Wingfrost]

Come on wing, you mean to tell me they should be able to have hair? And eyes? And a nose? Those are so girly smh get your shit together

 

[frocho]

When you show non kpop fans pictures of boy group members, in my experience the first response has always been “They look like girls.”

Why? Because they’re wearing makeup? Their clothes? Because they don’t meet the stereotypical “manly” look?
I know this is an old topic that has been ongoing for years but it’s still something I just don’t understand to this day.
What do you all think?

​

I get the same response too. I was at Walmart with my mom and we were looking at posters there was a poster of BTS and she said: "They look like girls". I rarely ever get another response when I show someone a boy group. The only person who didn't say that or something negative is my friend who called them handsome but otherwise, I always get bad comments whenever I show someone. I just think it's very stupid and I don't understand them when they say things like that.

 

[Yuzuru]

[/QUOTE]

When you show non kpop fans pictures of boy group members, in my experience the first response has always been “They look like girls.”

Why? Because they’re wearing makeup? Their clothes? Because they don’t meet the stereotypical “manly” look?
I know this is an old topic that has been ongoing for years but it’s still something I just don’t understand to this day.
What do you all think?

​

They’d have no knowledge how Korean standards work.

 

[StirFriedPanda]

When you show non kpop fans pictures of boy group members, in my experience the first response has always been “They look like girls.”

So as one of the resident old timers I want to address this because I've had my own battle with this! Hopefully the things I'm about to say don't make anyone to uncomfortable. Just like Korea has it's beauty ideals so does the west. Comments like these come from the west's idea of "masculinity" and "beauty" clashing with Korea's ideas of "masculinity" and "beauty". I remember as a kid when I once told me father that he looked "beautiful"(I was like 5). He very kindly "corrected" me and told me that men look "handsome" and "beautiful" is a term to describe women. I now think the entire thing is silly but it highlights the ideals the west has come from vs. where it is today. Older standards die slowly. Honestly, I think one of the reasons I have a hard time liking boy groups is how feminine they look. That feminine look is still shocking to me. I don't think poorly of them. I don't think they aren't men. I simply still have that western ideal baked into my last generation brain and it doesn't go away over night! Another reason, I find them intimidating! I think subconsciously a lot of men do as well because they just don't understand it. I find men that could pass as women attractive, especially if they doll up or dress like a woman. For a long time (most of my life in fact) it felt "shameful and dirty" because of the way I was brought up. In my more wise (and recent) years I've learned to accept it as just part of who I am. It doesn't mean I'm homosexual, it doesn't mean I'm shameful and dirty, it just means I find them attractive. It's like accepting 1+1 =2. A simple fact about myself. However those past teachings about "men, masculinity, and what I'm supposed to or not supposed to be attracted to" doesn't simply vanish. And I'm the LAST guy who should feel uncomfortable about a man looking "girlie" given the underwear I choose to wear. As far as underwear goes, the more girlie and cute, the more I'm probably going to like them. Again, it's just me. Given this fact, the "girlie men" shouldn't be shocking and make me feel uncomfortable but they still do. Don't take offense to comments like:

I get the same response too. I was at Walmart with my mom and we were looking at posters there was a poster of BTS and she said: "They look like girls".

It's just old people who won't, can't or aren't ready to see other options. As long as it's not said in a hateful way, just let it go.

 

[litc]

When you show non kpop fans pictures of boy group members, in my experience the first response has always been “They look like girls.”

Why? Because they’re wearing makeup? Their clothes? Because they don’t meet the stereotypical “manly” look?
I know this is an old topic that has been ongoing for years but it’s still something I just don’t understand to this day.
What do you all think?

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They have softer features apparently

it depends tho, it’s most but not all ig, I can’t see someone saying jackson looks like a girl for example