When we don't talk about race... (2 Viewers)

[Yoohyeon]

We naturally see someone as a human being.
Like, if you think about it, when we are talking about race, when we are thinking about the colour of someone's skin, that is when people's minds have access to racism.
When we look at someone no matter what colour skin they are, if we see them for the person they are, we automatically see them as a person and not a race, if that makes sense?
You would be able to communicate with them naturally instead of thinking about them having a different colour skin than you.
It's really not hard to do if we can all train our minds to do that.

 

[Mayday]

That's actually how I've always viewed people, thankfully. I usually noticed race afterwards. Not always, but majority of the time.

 

[emptycup]

Some people don't see other races as human beings first.

​

 

[SaviorITZY]

I feel like this would've been better off as "When we stop looking for race" instead "When we don't talk about race."

From the title alone I got a bad idea about what this thread was going to be about 👀

 

[raymondchouku]

Yes and No. I think when we talk about x person of x race being a victim of violence or the perpetrator of violence it doesn't really affect us, because we tend to react more to visual stimuli. For instance, I could read a news story about a group of people being murdered, but if I saw a depiction of such a crime I would be vastly more impacted. There is an image of a Syrian man holding his dead child in his arms that illustrates this point fairly efficiently. Google it and you will find it. Also, one may have feelings of isolation based on race and speaking about it with others of that race may be helpful.

Viewing oneself solely from a binary standpoint of "I am race x, therefore..." may lead to problems, and is often promulgated by the media and perceptions that the media represents everyday occurrences when the media reports on things that are not common (i.e. Theatre shootings, public stabbing, park murder).

 

[kodoku]

I don't get it, if you're gonna hate someone for having lighter or darker skin than you, might as well hate everyone because no one looks the same as you. To me, it's the same as someone else having shorter hair than me or being taller, or having blue eyes and not brown ones.......like, what does it matter, it's just the surface and everything else is the same......

 

[Yoohyeon]

I feel like this would've been better off as "When we stop looking for race" instead "When we don't talk about race."

From the title alone I got a bad idea about what this thread was going to be about 👀

'When we stop looking for race' doesn't make much sense to me. Do you mean "When we stop looking at race"?

I don't get it, if you're gonna hate someone for having lighter or darker skin than you, might as well hate everyone because no one looks the same as you. To me, it's the same as someone else having shorter hair than me or being taller, or having blue eyes and not brown ones.......like, what does it matter, it's just the surface and everything else is the same......

Yes, this is really true. This is what I'm trying to get at. Everyone is different, but instead, some people think only different cultures and races are different, but the fact is, we are all human beings and on this planet together, so we should all put our differences aside to all get along, because I can bet you that if we stopped judging and got to know someone regardless of who they are, life would really be that much better for everyone.

 

[Abeamus]

In an ideal world maybe that could happen but the problem is we're trying to change thoughts that people have put in place for years and it's only been really in the last 70ish years that these thoughts are being challenged which means that someone who is say 90 would have grew up in a time when it was okay. When you combine this with the fact that some people are stubborn and adversed to change then you have people who can influence others to think these kinds of thoughts which is no doubt part of the reason we still have a problem with such things.

As long as such things like that exist we do need to talk about them to help go towards solving the issue since otherwise it'd just be people letting those negative thoughts spread without positive ones and that definitely isn't what we want since then people could feel targetted for just living their life without harming anyone or anything.

 

[SeulPika]

One of my biggest annoyances about being in a interracial relationship is this ignorant question. "Are you only with her because she's Japanese?". No, I'm not with her because she's Japanese. I'm with her because she makes me laugh, she makes me feel comfortable and at ease. I'm with her because of our shared interests. I'm with her because I love her and she loves me.
I love her for her personality and the person that she is. Not because of her race! Her race doesn't define her as a person!

 

[Yoohyeon]

One of my biggest annoyances about being in a interracial relationship is this ignorant question. "Are you only with her because she's Japanese?". No, I'm not with her because she's Japanese. I'm with her because she makes me laugh, she makes me feel comfortable and at ease. I'm with her because of our shared interests. I'm with her because I love her and she loves me.
I love her for her personality and the person that she is. Not because of her race! Her race doesn't define her as a person!

This is exactly right. When people are ignorant like that, it just makes them bigoted and an idiot.
It's more like your Wife just 'happens to be Japanese'.
It's like when I watched this K-drama a while back and it has a lesbian couple, and one of them was being bullied and she said "I don't love her because she's a Woman...she just happens to be a woman who I love."

 

[SeulPika]

This is exactly right. When people are ignorant like that, it just makes them bigoted and an idiot.
It's more like your Wife just 'happens to be Japanese'.
It's like when I watched this K-drama a while back and it has a lesbian couple, and one of them was being bullied and she said "I don't love her because she's a Woman...she just happens to be a woman who I love."

Exactly that!

Love doesn't care about race or gender. Love cares about the humanity of that person that you've fallen for.

 

[Yoohyeon]

Exactly that!

Love doesn't care about race or gender. Love cares about the humanity of that person that you've fallen for.

Exactly.
I bet you also get the 'yellow fever' comments as well because she's Asian, right? It is extremely ignorant.

 

[SeulPika]

Exactly.
I bet you also get the 'yellow fever' comments as well because she's Asian, right? It is extremely ignorant.

I've had it all over the years...

'Yellow fever'. And the good old classic question before we had our daughter together. "aren't you worried about what your future children will look like"...

And it doesn't make these kind of questions or comments right. But we both accepted the fact that some people would look at us differently just because we're a interracial couple. But their opinions don't matter to us. The only thing that matters is our happiness and being able to provide a loving environment for our daughters.
And we're proud to call ourselves a British/Japanese household and we enjoy incorporating each others' cultural traditions into our family life.

 

[SnowWhite]

Is this thread pointing at something? Did knetz do anything?

 

[Yoohyeon]

I've had it all over the years...

'Yellow fever'. And the good old classic question before we had our daughter together. "aren't you worried about what your future children will look like"...

And it doesn't make these kind of questions or comments right. But we both accepted the fact that some people would look at us differently just because we're a interracial couple. But their opinions don't matter to us. The only thing that matters is our happiness and being able to provide a loving environment for our daughters.
And we're proud to call ourselves a British/Japanese household and we enjoy incorporating each others' cultural traditions into our family life.

And that is the way to see things :) Your family is no different from anyone else's family.
As you said, if you care what other people will think, then your family will crumble, so it's important to ignore those types of people and focus on providing for your family.

 

[Yoohyeon]

Is this thread pointing at something? Did knetz do anything?

No, just a discussion. That's why it's in the general section.

 

[SeulPika]

And that is the way to see things :) Your family is no different from anyone else's family.
As you said, if you care what other people will think, then your family will crumble, so it's important to ignore those types of people and focus on providing for your family.

And that's the philosophy that we are bringing our daughters up on. That their own happiness should mean more to them than caring about what other people think about them. That they should do what they want and love who they want without caring about the opinions of other people. (and hopefully seeing how my wife and I are with one another will give them inspiration on how they should be treated by their significant other)