A very long and personal story... (Need some advice and help) (1 Viewer)

[RainbowDevil]

Hmmm I think the situation is already awkward between you two, which will make it more difficult to be like before. Things will feel like... unfinished. And if you really really like her, you’ll want to tell her at some point. Maybe give her a few days before

I’ll give you a personal example

Spoiler: Story time

When I was in highschool I was friends with a guy. He told me at some point that he likes me, but after one year and something he got the courage. And I was already in the ‘I see you only as a friend’ phase xD That was too late. We had an awkward time indeed after that, but eventually we both moved on, both had new relationships and even attended a party together after that. We still talk if we see each other and stuff. Nothing awkward left.

Did you like him at the time when you first found out?

And that story just proves that if I do that we legit can't be friends... not even close to what we were...

 

[bulletproof]

Did you like him at the time when you first found out?

And that story just proves that if I do that we legit can't be friends... not even close to what we were...

When he told me? No, we were good friends, it was too late already. And I am am weird with these things. I need to create some chemistry from the beginning. And I was 16 btw

No, that story proves that you can be friends after that. You alreay got the awkward part at your bday. She is for sure embarassed, let her know that she shouldn’t be. I think you need to talk about this. She might already know your intentions. But one of you two needs to talk about this, and with her drunk ‘jumping’, for sure she wouldn’t say anything now

 

[bulletproof]

@RainbowDevil go on Discord please, I have a story time 2.0 Maybe that one is better

 

[Suzy]

I'd have no problem with giving her time if I knew what would come out of it... as is I'm just scared of what might happen while that time passes, if she just moves on or thinks I've given up on her and doesn't say anything cause she's that type of person... scares me, all of it scares me like I'm gonna lose something meaningful to me...

In that case, I think you should talk to her. You said things are awkward between the two of you right now and that you’re scared of what might happen if you give her time so I think it’s only logical to speak to her. I agree with Bullet on this one, I don’t think there’s anything to lose. I mean, leaving it and letting her move on and possibly having regrets afterwards seems worse. At least if you talk it out you’ll know where you stand and you’ll have an idea of what to do from here on. Like I said in my first comment, if you hinted that you liked her while she was drunk I doubt she remembers it so she probably just thinks she made a fool of herself. And unless she’s all touchy and kissy with everyone when she’s drunk, from what you said alone I’m going to guess that she has some feelings for you too. I really think you should talk it out if you think you’ll regret it in the future. If you think your feelings are just a phase or anything then leave it be and with time things will hopefully work out between you two.

 

[RainbowDevil]

In that case, I think you should talk to her. You said things are awkward between the two of you right now and that you’re scared of what might happen if you give her time so I think it’s only logical to speak to her. I agree with Bullet on this one, I don’t think there’s anything to lose. I mean, leaving it and letting her move on and possibly having regrets afterwards seems worse. At least if you talk it out you’ll know where you stand and you’ll have an idea of what to do from here on. Like I said in my first comment, if you hinted that you liked her while she was drunk I doubt she remembers it so she probably just thinks she made a fool of herself. And unless she’s all touchy and kissy with everyone when she’s drunk, from what you said alone I’m going to guess that she has some feelings for you too. I really think you should talk it out if you think you’ll regret it in the future. If you think your feelings are just a phase or anything then leave it be and with time things will hopefully work out between you two.

Thank you Suziepoo I think I'm gonna take yours and Dii's advice and talk to her, I'll let her be for a while so we both think over it a bit and then I'll tell he what I feel and see what happens.

 

[potato]

Agreed, I almost always find myself in the I'm hopeless but still holding on to some hope situation and in the end that hope kinda holds me down even tho it literally never came true at least as far as love went.

I don't know how we would talk about it tho... as i mentioned she doesn't talk about her feelings like ever and I myself am in a situation where I was not even counting on being with her but she gave me hope out of nowhere so I'm not even sure what I would tell her... like... "I like you but I'm also fine if you don't like me at all in that way", it sounds both like I'm not that into her and like I'm a bit emotionless even tho it's like the opposite of both as far as current feelings go.

I also don't know a literal way to get to a situation where we'd talk about it as in, how I'd even start it and if bringing the situation up... again, might just fuck up the relationship right back, right after we'd "healed" so I really don't know...

I think it's good that you don't lose hope.

If you are let down in the end, you will be sad. But you will know that you tried and had the hope and perseverance despite being bogged down by all these issues that come with the relationship between you two. After everything has cooled down a bit, I would encourage you to tell her your feelings towards her. There is nothing wrong with trying and if she refuses, you will come out of it knowing that you tried your best.

If you're struggling to talk to her, I would advise contacting her through text or phone and arranging to meet up directly by telling her you have something to say. I feel like being true to her will be the best possible outcome in this situation.

If you're unsure on how to convey your feelings towards her, maybe tell her in the clearest possible way without beating around the bush. I think she would appreciate that a lot more, regardless of whether she has feelings towards you or not. If she accepts your confession, something extremely good came out of it. If she says no, her feelings will be properly confirmed so you no longer need to be confused anymore. It may seem like a daunting thing but I know you have the courage to tell her how you feel. <3

I hope my advice helps although I'm not very knowledgeable in these situations either. I'm rooting for you. ❤

Edit: It seems like people have already given you this advice. Sorry TT

 

[RainbowDevil]

I think it's good that you don't lose hope.

If you are let down in the end, you will be sad. But you will know that you tried and had the hope and perseverance despite being bogged down by all these issues that come with the relationship between you two. After everything has cooled down a bit, I would encourage you to tell her your feelings towards her. There is nothing wrong with trying and if she refuses, you will come out of it knowing that you tried your best.

If you're struggling to talk to her, I would advise contacting her through text or phone and arranging to meet up directly by telling her you have something to say. I feel like being true to her will be the best possible outcome in this situation.

If you're unsure on how to convey your feelings towards her, maybe tell her in the clearest possible way without beating around the bush. I think she would appreciate that a lot more, regardless of whether she has feelings towards you or not. If she accepts your confession, something extremely good came out of it. If she says no, her feelings will be properly confirmed so you no longer need to be confused anymore. It may seem like a daunting thing but I know you have the courage to tell her how you feel. <3

I hope my advice helps although I'm not very knowledgeable in these situations either. I'm rooting for you. ❤

Edit: It seems like people have already given you this advice. Sorry TT

It's alright all advice helps and what you say is somewhat different from what others said and I think I might just do what you said instead of just writing a giant text... Asking her out and telling her would most likely be best and as you say what comes out of it can't really be worse than what I have now, and it will definitely resolve some stuff and hopefully it ends up helping out the current awkwardness. I hope the courage I feel rn will persevere until the moment when I need to ask her to talk and actually tell her everything

 

[potato]

It's alright all advice helps and what you say is somewhat different from what others said and I think I might just do what you said instead of just writing a giant text... Asking her out and telling her would most likely be best and as you say what comes out of it can't really be worse than what I have now, and it will definitely resolve some stuff and hopefully it ends up helping out the current awkwardness. I hope the courage I feel rn will persevere until the moment when I need to ask her to talk and actually tell her everything

Like I said before, I believe in you! Wishing you the best of luck <3

 

[Buttercup]

I think it ought to be awkward especially since she kissed you and spilled everything when she was drunk.. I'm guessing she's embarrassed after what had happened. And don't lose hope because there is a possibility she likes you but is hiding the fact because she doesn't think she's good enough for you.

I hope you feel better~

 

[jasque]

I wouldn't want to have a serious relationship with someone like her, unless it was just a bad day.

 

[RainbowDevil]

I think it ought to be awkward especially since she kissed you and spilled everything when she was drunk.. I'm guessing she's embarrassed after what had happened. And don't lose hope because there is a possibility she likes you but is hiding the fact because she doesn't think she's good enough for you.

I hope you feel better~

Thank you, I'm hoping for the same, trying to distract myself in as many ways as I can, I've been successfully distracting myself the entire day

 

[RainbowDevil]

I wouldn't want to have a serious relationship with someone like her, unless it was just a bad day.

In a sense, you are correct to think so, but... It's weird, she's weird as a person and that's why I like her, as I mentioned she isn't a normal girl, she's a fcking bitch 😂 She's not a bitch towards me tho, she just messes around with me mostly. Like yes... she's not even close to being perfect, she's not even the perfect looking person but hell I liked her for some reason and well I'm where I am cause of it. It's actually something I've been wishing for.... to not like someone for their looks but for the way she acts and personality in general...

 

[RainbowDevil]

@potato @Mayah @Vikki @Hajima @Chlorine @Buttercup
I'd like to thank y'all for helping me out when I was in the crappy situation, I'd like to update you all

That it went horribly
I basically got called a drama queen (which I am not since y'all told me it made sense as far as what I said)
And well denied that she had any feelings for me and said "I kissed T(a mutal friend) too and so did she a few times" (that's supposed to be a normal thing... which it isn't)
And then that she needed time before we could be friends again.

I feel embarrassed a bit... even tho I really shouldn't be, cause she sees me as someone that overthinks sht way too much...
But hey sht is what it is, I feel better for getting it over with and now I can sleep normally and not think about it.
Thank you all once again for your kind comments

 

[RainbowDevil]

also @mirella if you'd like to know what happened lol

 

[Mayday]

@potato @Mayah @Vikki @Hajima @Chlorine @Buttercup
I'd like to thank y'all for helping me out when I was in the crappy situation, I'd like to update you all

That it went horribly
I basically got called a drama queen (which I am not since y'all told me it made sense as far as what I said)
And well denied that she had any feelings for me and said "I kissed T(a mutal friend) too and so did she a few times" (that's supposed to be a normal thing... which it isn't)
And then that she needed time before we could be friends again.

I feel embarrassed a bit... even tho I really shouldn't be, cause she sees me as someone that overthinks sht way too much...
But hey sht is what it is, I feel better for getting it over with and now I can sleep normally and not think about it.
Thank you all once again for your kind comments

That must be terrible, I'm sorry to hear that. On the bright side, though, at least it's over! Also, if she's really meant for you, she'll realize her mistake sooner or later. If not, so be it. The best thing you can do in that situation is to move on, and find someone better. Best of luck!

 

[potato]

@potato @Mayah @Vikki @Hajima @Chlorine @Buttercup
I'd like to thank y'all for helping me out when I was in the crappy situation, I'd like to update you all

That it went horribly
I basically got called a drama queen (which I am not since y'all told me it made sense as far as what I said)
And well denied that she had any feelings for me and said "I kissed T(a mutal friend) too and so did she a few times" (that's supposed to be a normal thing... which it isn't)
And then that she needed time before we could be friends again.

I feel embarrassed a bit... even tho I really shouldn't be, cause she sees me as someone that overthinks sht way too much...
But hey sht is what it is, I feel better for getting it over with and now I can sleep normally and not think about it.
Thank you all once again for your kind comments

I'm sad that it went that way :(

But I'm happy that you're glad it's over. You may have left on bad terms but at least you don't have to think about it again. I just want to tell you that you're not in the wrong at all in this situation and no matter how embarassed you may feel now, it will pass.

I also don't think it is normal to kiss someone with no feelings attached and expect the other person to not have any feelings attached either but I don't think I should interfere in the matter. What's most important now is that you had the courage to tell her. Even though the result wasn't the best, with time, this situation will pass. I think the fact that you have the courage inside of you to tell her your feelings is the best part of this. Well done <3

 

[RainbowDevil]

I'm sad that it went that way :(

But I'm happy that you're glad it's over. You may have left on bad terms but at least you don't have to think about it again. I just want to tell you that you're not in the wrong at all in this situation and no matter how embarassed you may feel now, it will pass.

I also don't think it is normal to kiss someone with no feelings attached and expect the other person to not have any feelings attached either but I don't think I should interfere in the matter. What's most important now is that you had the courage to tell her. Even though the result wasn't the best, with time, this situation will pass. I think the fact that you have the courage inside of you to tell her your feelings is the best part of this. Well done <3

Awww thanks a lot, you're so nice Means the world to me tbh

 

[Darkseid]

Oof atleast that's over with and you can move past it now, be free of the burden so. It is what it is. Even if she is attracted to you, if she can't accept it or act on it, then it's not meant to be. You tried what could be done from your end, just get on with usual life now and if anything happens later, you'll deal with it in a cooler way

 

[Hajima]

She is the one who started all of this.. It's not your fault, and for her to cause all of this and then call you a Drama queen the heck...

She seems immature tbh you are still young just don't take her seriously and move on.

 

[RainbowDevil]

She is the one who started all of this.. It's not your fault, and for her to cause all of this and then call you a Drama queen the heck...

She seems immature tbh you are still young just don't take her seriously and move on.

Lol my dad said the same thing ahahahha
And yea I see it that way kinda, I'm not gonna be hard on myself for something that a normal person... wouldn't do... and thank you