Do you struggle with present you and past you? (4 Viewers)

[Day]

I really, seriously do. The past version of myself, I hold a lot of anger and also a lot of sorrow for the person I used to be coming from the person that I am now. I don't know how to compartmentalize those feelings and move on to the present and future without negative feelings.

Are you able to look at the past you as a sealed off memory or do you find yourself stuck there? If you've moved on, how did you do it? What is your mindset?

 

[Day]

@litc come here friend do you have this problem too?

 

[Yerichu]

Before, I use to be the type of person that would like to approach others and maybe create a friendship but today, I am the opposite for various reasons, first society, then environment, then personal issues. We may not always be brightest person but I don't also want to be someone's enemy.
I can somewhat look at myself before but I cant bare to look at myself today as I don't like some of the traits I possess, yet here I am
But in 10 years or so, I wont be able to look at my teenage/young adult self

 

[Day]

Before, I use to be the type of person that would like to approach others and maybe create a friendship but today, I am the opposite for various reasons, first society, then environment, then personal issues. We may not always be brightest person but I don't also want to be someone's enemy.
I can somewhat look at myself before but I cant bare to look at myself today as I don't like some of the traits I possess, yet here I am
But in 10 years or so, I wont be able to look at my teenage/young adult self

I'm sorry you're having those feelings I really hope things get better. Do you spend a lot of time with yourself? Is there anything you can do right now to lessen the burden on your shoulders?

At the time in my life when I had the best understand of myself, my limits, and who I was, that was the time where I could not look in the mirror and had the most self-hatred. Now, in order to not be there, I don't spend time with myself and instead become numb by doing other things (this is probably a version of self harm unfortunately). Right now, there are things I could do if I had the financial means and the capability to do so, that I think would better myself, but at the same time I think a good chunk of money would fix most people's problems.

I hope that you and I can become butterflies in this lifetime. I, too, want to shed that burden, that hatred, and that version of myself - hell, even this current present version - and just exist without all the aspects that come with it. I want to be happy.

 

[litc]

@litc come here friend do you have this problem too?

Well I don’t think we should not look at the past as a way to understand current self, like I was bullied for being “dumb” in 5th grade, for being impulsive and not understanding social norms/cues/repeating things rather than for being worst in the class or whatever, and I don’t think I can say it didn’t affect current me at all because it’s a big reason I became scared of people and am quieter now

there was also a repressed memory I had in fifth grade that I didn’t re-remember till age 15, bc I was like I know smth happened to make me so depressed, but what?

im over it now, I would be nice to any of those peeps if I saw them again, it was basically the whole class bullying me, you know how it is

and the thing is I didn’t understand smth and ended up getting in trouble

the freaking PRINCIPAL knew I didn’t understand social cues and norms and how to interact with people but no one made it official then and I feel cheated

 

[Yerichu]

I'm sorry you're having those feelings I really hope things get better. Do you spend a lot of time with yourself? Is there anything you can do right now to lessen the burden on your shoulders?

At the time in my life when I had the best understand of myself, my limits, and who I was, that was the time where I could not look in the mirror and had the most self-hatred. Now, in order to not be there, I don't spend time with myself and instead become numb by doing other things (this is probably a version of self harm unfortunately). Right now, there are things I could do if I had the financial means and the capability to do so, that I think would better myself, but at the same time I think a good chunk of money would fix most people's problems.

I hope that you and I can become butterflies in this lifetime. I, too, want to shed that burden, that hatred, and that version of myself - hell, even this current present version - and just exist without all the aspects that come with it. I want to be happy.

That was heartwarming from you, thank you. Life can be cruel in our lives yet we have to do our best to make the outcome worth it. Someday I hope happiness comes, hopefully you find that piece of yourself.
During my time in highschool, I hated how distant my relationship with others became and how ugly I appeared
I can't even bother looking at a mirror because it makes me hate myself more
I know myself that I have insecurities around me that I always complain about
Yet I hope that someday I'll appear with a much better persona than how I am. But even in the darkness, there is light and I look forward to seeing it

 

[Day]

Well I don’t think we should not look at the past as a way to understand current self, like I was bullied for being “dumb” in 5th grade, for being impulsive and not understanding social norms/cues/repeating things rather than for being worst in the class or whatever, and I don’t think I can say it didn’t affect current me at all because it’s a big reason I became scared of people and am quieter now

there was also a repressed memory I had in fifth grade that I didn’t re-remember till age 15, bc I was like I know smth happened to make me so depressed, but what?

im over it now, I would be nice to any of those peeps if I saw them again, it was basically the whole class bullying me, you know how it is

and the thing is I didn’t understand smth and ended up getting in trouble

the freaking PRINCIPAL knew I didn’t understand social cues and norms and how to interact with people but no one made it official then and I feel cheated

Do you think there's a way to put those feelings completely behind you? I want to lock up my past in a box and never go there again. Whenever I see people from the past, I cannot be around them. My family, I cannot do it. I think the proper term would be to call me a coward, and while I get it, the truth is that I don't know who I am anymore, what I'm doing, and I cannot be the same person I was before - I won't be that person any longer. The source is undeniably the autistic burnout, but a thing like that would be labeled an "excuse" and not a valid reason. Shou is a coward. Shou doesn't come around. Shou won't see her family. I don't want to see them. I want nothing to do with them. Whenever I'm around them, I'm required to mask and I won't do it anymore. I don't know how to deal with these feelings

 

[litc]

Do you think there's a way to put those feelings completely behind you? I want to lock up my past in a box and never go there again. Whenever I see people from the past, I cannot be around them. My family, I cannot do it. I think the proper term would be to call me a coward, and while I get it, the truth is that I don't know who I am anymore, what I'm doing, and I cannot be the same person I was before - I won't be that person any longer. The source is undeniably the autistic burnout, but a thing like that would be labeled an "excuse" and not a valid reason. Shou is a coward. Shou doesn't come around. Shou won't see her family. I don't want to see them. I want nothing to do with them. Whenever I'm around them, I'm required to mask and I won't do it anymore. I don't know how to deal with these feelings

You have to confront the past to get over it

you can’t lock it up because it's why you want to avoid them, if you act like it doesn’t exist you won’t have any reason for them but it’s real, just don’t linger on it

if you’re asking about the repressed memory it was because of severe trauma as a defense mechanism not on purpose

and now that I know what happened and re remembered I’m not happy but I can move on with my life ill dm you

it answers questions

 

[Day]

You have to confront the past to get over it

you can’t lock it up because it's why you want to avoid them, if you act like it doesn’t exist you won’t have any reason for them but it’s real, just don’t linger on it

if you’re asking about the repressed memory it was because of severe trauma as a defense mechanism not on purpose

and now that I know what happened and re remembered I’m not happy but I can move on with my life ill dm you

it answers questions

My version of confronting the past is looking at it for what it was and moving forward in my life. But, I feel like if those aspects or people are in my current life, then I cannot move on and I will always be stuck in the past. I cannot move forward with those people still in my life. I'm a little confused tbh, wdym "you won't have any reason for them but it's real" what does that mean o.o

 

[litc]

My version of confronting the past is looking at it for what it was and moving forward in my life. But, I feel like if those aspects or people are in my current life, then I cannot move on and I will always be stuck in the past. I cannot move forward with those people still in my life. I'm a little confused tbh, wdym "you won't have any reason for them but it's real" what does that mean o.o

like that's your reason for avoiding them

so you can't lock it away

 

[Day]

like that's your reason for avoiding them

so you can't lock it away

Why

 

[Belgizen]

I already struggle with my future self tbh

 

[Day]

I already struggle with my future self tbh

I'm sorry to hear that

 

[Belgizen]

I'm sorry to hear that

it's ok, i blame my past and future self tbh

 

[Day]

it's ok, i blame my past and future self tbh

I hope you can get through that. Even if you spend your days with just one thing that makes you happy, you should do it. Before anything else, your happiness must always come first

 

[Belgizen]

I hope you can get through that. Even if you spend your days with just one thing that makes you happy, you should do it. Before anything else, your happiness must always come first

thank you

 

[magali]

I THOUGHT THIS WAS A GRAMMATICAL QUESTION 😭😭😭

 

[magali]

also yes, i wouldnt say anything too deep or bad but i constantly stay awake and think about things i've done that i regret and i wish i could change my past self

 

[Day]

I THOUGHT THIS WAS A GRAMMATICAL QUESTION 😭😭😭

Welcome to today's deep thoughts by Shou

 

[magali]

Welcome to today's deep thoughts by Shou

i was so confused, i thought there was a past 'you' in english