Do you struggle with present you and past you? (4 Viewers)

[Day]

also yes, i wouldnt say anything too deep or bad but i constantly stay awake and think about things i've done that i regret and i wish i could change my past self

I wish I knew how to get out of that loop. I feel like it's holding me back and I don't know how to walk forward. If I ever find an answer, I will be sharing with everyone here

 

[litc]

Why

I don't understand you tbh

lock away = repressed memories

 

[magali]

I wish I knew how to get out of that loop. I feel like it's holding me back and I don't know how to walk forward. If I ever find an answer, I will be sharing with everyone here

same i think it is nice to have someone to relate and talk to. i spend so much time worrying about what i did and not what i'm going to do, and it just keeps happening: when i don't think about the future right now, future me will look back and wished i did. then the same would happen, all over again

 

[litc]

your past shapes your present, so ignoring it instead of looking at it to see the challenges brought from your past so you can be mindful of them and grow will never work

being stuck in the past and never growing because you don't try to live in the present doesn't work either

and repressing memories is just a defense mechanism not something anyone should strive for

I think I was smarter pre-covid

I think I have not gotten any smarter since age 17

 

[Day]

I don't understand you tbh

lock away = repressed memories

Honestly I think that's better than living like this

 

[Day]

your past shapes your present, so ignoring it instead of looking at it to see the challenges brought from your past so you can be mindful of them and grow will never work

being stuck in the past and never growing because you don't try to live in the present doesn't work either

and repressing memories is just a defense mechanism not something anyone should strive for

I think I was smarter pre-covid

I think I have not gotten any smarter since age 17

I don't know how to get rid of that anger and discomfort in those situations. To me, it seems logical to avoid the situations all-together. I don't understand how to grow past that - that's my main problem

 

[litc]

Honestly I think that's better than living like this

as someone who has had a repressed memory it's not better - you're depressed constantly and don't know why, and then you can never understand it to see why you are the way you are and move past it I'm not gonna say what it was here on this thread so I will dm you

 

[litc]

I don't know how to get rid of that anger and discomfort in those situations. To me, it seems logical to avoid the situations all-together. I don't understand how to grow past that - that's my main problem

I'm not saying not to avoid situations I'm saying look at what you don't like and how it affected you instead of ignoring it, because ignoring those problems turns them bigger ~

 

[litc]

also yes, i wouldnt say anything too deep or bad but i constantly stay awake and think about things i've done that i regret and i wish i could change my past self

I agree^

my biggest emotion is guilt always

 

[magali]

I agree^

my biggest emotion is guilt always

same, even things that werent my fault or that i couldnt have stopped make me feel bad, i have one specific case that i feel really badly about but i have no one else to really talk about it

 

[Day]

same, even things that werent my fault or that i couldnt have stopped make me feel bad, i have one specific case that i feel really badly about but i have no one else to really talk about it

If you need to share, I will gladly listen to you

 

[magali]

If you need to share, I will gladly listen to you

idk, i feel kinda bad oversharing to people about personal things but thank you for offering, it helps a lot

 

[Day]

idk, i feel kinda bad oversharing to people about personal things but thank you for offering, it helps a lot

I will always have an open ear

 

[litc]

same, even things that werent my fault or that i couldnt have stopped make me feel bad, i have one specific case that i feel really badly about but i have no one else to really talk about it

you should write it down in a journal

 

[noctis]

i do, on a daily i always think about what i could've done, im always reminded of how i lost friends because of how i acted and showed my emotions. present me, im constantly lost in my head because im surpressing my emotions so i don't hurt anyone. i wish i could be as open and honest as i was in the past but that also caused me to overshare to people who didnt deserve that and also they use that against me.

 

[dark_tranquility]

Both interlock so whatever happens its like a weird click going on

 

[ning]

my past self i was more happy and open to my feelings. now im not and i wish i could be who i used to be. i find it very hard to open up bc i feel as tho im putting pressure on others to comfort me so i always act ok. i stopped being happy at around 10. i have never looked forward to anything since then. now i look forward to coming on here obviously but irl theres nothing. i truly envy my current self and miss my old self. no matter how hard i try ik ill never be the old me. i used to think if i acted happy maybe ill get happy. but it only made it worse. my feelings are like in a bottle, where theres no more room but i make room. anytime i feel joy or excitement in something, something goes wrong and it ruins my whole day. i can never have a smile on my face. its always forced. but past me never forced one. i miss that.

 

[Deleted member 74]

my past is crucial to understanding the person I am today. a lot of adults failed me when I was a kid. I was severely bullied for being different all my years of schooling and this had impacted me a lot back then. the eldest to immigrant parents, a lot of expectations and pressure were placed on my shoulders. they didn't know how to love and care about me the way they should've, I've had to accept this. in my teens, I struggled a lot with my anger, bad habits, and sadness. I was self-destructive, and still am. I was left alone to deal with my problems a lot of the time, so inner strength is something that came through trial and error until I eventually could deal with everything on my own. past me didn't really get the chance to just be a child. to just be a teen. so I feel robbed of years of my life in a way. because I was so focused on just coping with my mental health. I feel a lot of sorrow for little me, I always think about what could've been. I met a lot of bad people I shouldn't have ever met who took advantage of me and my mental health, and there are things I wish I could take back. it's also my fault some of the best friendships in my life became strained back then, I didn't know how to accept that there were in fact people who cared about me at the time. I just didn't believe it. and I'd repressed a lot of memories. I shut myself away. over the years my personality has completely changed.

I don't know why. one day I woke up and I was just different. I guess my circumstances, environment, and experiences made me this way. I used to easily cry and get upset over people not liking me. now I don't. I'm not naive and hopeful anymore, I don't trust people. there are a lot of bad and unhealthy qualities, but also a lot of good. now that I'm an adult, I have the freedom to do and be however I want to be, and this is so liberating for me. I stopped caring what people irl think of me. I think walking forward is a gradual process, your past shapes you so you can never truly escape it. but I don't find myself stuck in the past anymore, I see all my past memories as sealed off because I've done the inner work to confront it and move on, through therapy, through my own self reflection, and through accepting that I can't change what happened. I can only change now.

 

[magikarp]

yeah... i should of done better when I was younger

 

[Pirioca]

Nope, because without my past I wouldn't be the person that I am now. The past is over and it's not guaranteed that we'll have a future. So our present is the only time frame where we could really live.