Rumor Madness... (1 Viewer)

Emanresu · 14 December 2019

Madness...

There I was eating cereal. Just an honest person. Not out to hurt anyone. Optimistic about life and the world.

When I moved wrong and the gods willed my cereal bowl to tilt in my lap and the milk spilled out all over.

"Holy shit!"

I yelled as I stood up quickly, milk soaking my pants and into the chair.

Being a boy scout. I knew what I must do.

To the paper towels! I yelled in a take charge attitude.

So I ran across the house towards the kitchen and my paper towels stash.

As I was walking. Barefoot.

I noticed a "smush" beneath my feet.

I stopped my charge to the kitchen and lifted up my toes. "Cat puke?!!!"

There between my toes and on the floor was a mushy present from my Mao.

Ahhhhhh! I screamed..... But gritted my teeth.

This would not stop me! I am strength!

I repeated this mantra to myself as I stumbled into the kitchen, pants dripping with milk and cat vomit under my feet.

I grabbed the paper towels suddenly filled with a can do spirit!

I raced back to the couch and cleaned up the milk. Raced to the vomit floor and got rid of the evidence. Then I raced upstairs and changed my embarrassing groin soaked pants.

Cocky and high with my conquest I descended slowly down the stairs. Knowing I could take on anything.

Then I looked over to the kitchen.

Something had caught my eye.

It was my cat Mao.

He was on the counter next to the milk bowl I had discarded there in during the battle.

He looks up at me. Gives me one of those cat stares

And then proceeds to knock off the bowl onto the floor. The last remnants of the milk splashing out all over the kitchen.

"MADNESS!!!!!". I yell and sink to the floor defeated.

As I sulk head in hands...

Milk slowly drips and flows over my kitchen floor. Mocking me and my life.